Across the Ocean
by KatieIsLost
Summary: Post rescue, Jack needs to find Kate, so he does. But what now?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Jack stepped out of his air-conditioned room at the Peoria Motel 6 and the heat hit him like a ton of bricks. As he walked to his beat up Chevy, he wiped away the beads of sweat that had instantly formed on his temple. He slid easily into the truck and put on the sunglasses he had left on the dashboard.

The truck's air conditioning had stopped working long before Jack had purchased the truck from an old man in Phoenix three weeks ago, but he didn't care. He could afford better, but couldn't see the sense in a luxury vehicle or a four star hotel. Not here anyway. On the island, Jack had grown accustomed to doing with out, and the simple pleasures of a working vehicle and a shower were enough for him.

Actually, the locale seemed much more suited to a man like Sawyer, and Jack chuckled to himself as the thought crossed his mind. If Sawyer could see him now, big city doctor in Nowheresville, Arizona, content just to live the simple life of a rusted out truck, cable tv and Chinese take out. What, oh what would he say?

He pulled out of the motel's driveway, one hand on the steering wheel, the other draped out over the open window. Blasts of hot August wind hit his face and he pressed on the gas. The truck topped out at about 50mph, but he knew it would only take him 15 minutes to arrive at his destination. The short drive had become second nature during the three weeks he had lived at the motel on the outskirts of Tucson. He flipped on the radio, but today, just like the days before, only a country station would come in. He switched it off. Although he was sure this new spare way of life had something to do with self punishment, he wasn't willing to subject himself to that kind of torture. So as he drove, he allowed his mind to wander.

------------------------

They had only been on the island two months before they were rescued. Jack, while excited about the prospect of returning to civilization, had known instantly what it would mean for Kate. In the back of his mind, he had always wondered if Kate would opt to stay on the Island rather than be taken back into custody. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, he had never gotten the chance to find out.

One morning, nearly 6 weeks ago - had it really only been that long? Jack wondered to himself, it felt like years ago – Jack had been on the beach discussing the Locke/Hatch situation with Kate and Sayid when they had seen 3 black hummers drive up along the shore. Stunned, most of them had stood slack jawed and stared as men clad in black military style coveralls had had exited the vehicles quickly and run up to the large group of survivors. Jack had found it incredibly difficult to wrap his brain around what was going on. Was it the Others? Where did they get the vehicles and the military issue rifles?

Jack saw Kate reach for her bag and turn to run, but unthinkingly, he had grabbed her wrist. He didn't want to face whatever this was alone. He had cursed himself daily for that small gesture.

"Kate Austin?" one particularly gruff looking man said as he approached them.

Kate looked at a loss for words, but finally she must have decided that a lie wasn't going to save her now. She nodded slowly. The man, who Jack would later find out was Agent Westin, seemed to take Kate down in one fluid, violent motion. Her arm was wrested from Jack's hand and mere moments later Kate was flat on the ground with Westin's knee in her back. She didn't struggle as she was placed in hand cuffs and jerked into a standing position.

Westin, who looked disarmingly similar to Locke, barked orders at the men behind him, "Round up the others for questioning and debriefing. Jameson, take this little firecracker to the brig immediately, 3 armed guards at all times. Don't take your rifle off her!"

Jack and Kate had only seconds before she was carted off, but Jack couldn't say anything to her. The words caught in his throat, and he felt his eyes begin to water. He swallowed a hard lump in his throat as his brow furrowed, but he didn't take his eyes off her. She held his gaze, her eyes dry but expressive. He tried to convey his regret at his momentary lapse in judgment. She seemed to silently forgive him with a small smile, and as they roughly pulled her to the nearest SUV, she whipped her head around to look at him again, silently mouthing the word "Jack."

The rest of them had been unceremoniously told to gather all their belongings and find anyone not on the beach. They were to be ready to leave the island that had been their home within the half hour. There was a ship waiting, just down the beach and out of sight, ready to take them all back to Sydney.

The ship, while big enough to be a cruise ship, was gun metal grey and unmarked. The interior, what Jack saw of it anyway, was extremely utilitarian and seemed to be military. Once in his new quarters, which he shared with Sayid, Charlie and Sawyer, they were all summarily questioned by Westin and his men. Each survivor was taken separately to a room that looked suspiciously like it belonged in a police department. There was even a two way mirror on one wall. They were all questioned about their time on the island and the chain of events. There was particular focus on the "unexplainable or strange phenomena" of the island. The entire thing was very disconcerting. Made more so by the fact that none of the men questioning them or guarding them would answer any of their questions. "All your queries will be answered in Sydney" was the standard reply.

After his debriefing, Charlie had been deposited back at their room by two armed gaurds. He rubbed his arms where they had gripped him and he shouted at them as they turned to go "Its not like we wanted to crash on that bloody Island!"

Sawyer chimed in sarcastically, "I may not be up on my army lingo, Private Ryan, but I thought "debriefing" meant that we were told what the hell is going on!"


	2. Chapter 1 cont

I somehow always mess up when I post here! So this is a continuation of chapter 1. I also forgot my disclaimer, so i may as well do it now, i dont own anything having to do with lost. and now, the rest of chapter 1...

"Hey Perkins, this ones got a mouth on him, don't he?" one man said to the other.

"Sure does Dowd, why don't you wipe that grin off his face?"

And without warning, the man called Perkins punched Sawyer squarely in the jaw, knocking him backwards and into the door frame. Sawyer slumped down, his head lolling on his chest and Jack bent down to help him. As Perkins and Dowd walked down the corridor, Jack called out to them "Where's Kate!" There was no response. "Where is she!" He hollered again to no avail.

Sayid bent down to help Jack lift Sawyer onto one of the bunks. "Private Ryan?" he asked.

Sawyer grinned up at him his head slightly cocked, through his bloody teeth he answered, "All I could come up with on the spot."

A week later, after a nerve wracking flight from Sydney to LA, Jack found himself standing in his empty, immaculate house, still no closer to understanding what the hell had happened to them. Worse, he had no idea where Kate was.

Much of his time at home was spent pacing and answering the phone calls from family members he hadn't heard from in years. His mother had been a constant presence at the house, and while at first it had been comforting to have her there, that had worn off in about two days. He was constantly assuring her that he was fine, he was adjusting fine, and he would be fine for the foreseeable future. After all, he had only been away for two months. This was, of course, a lie. He was far from fine.

He had he had been offered his job back at the hospital, but hadn't yet accepted. He was in limbo, unsure of his next move. He thought of Kate constantly, and one night it had come to him. It was so simple, he was surprised he hadn't thought of it before. He had to find her. It was the only way he could become a normal, functioning human being again, he had to know that she was okay.

Thinking that it would be a difficult task, Jack had prepared himself for a long and involved search, possibly with the help of expensive private detectives and attorneys. He was surprised then, when a simple internet search of a prison database had come up with her name as well as her mug shot. She was being held at a high security women's correctional facility in Arizona. The following morning, Jack had packed a few things, left a message on his mother's cell, and drove the 6 hours from LA to Phoenix. There he had bought the truck, hired a high priced criminal lawyer who got results, and made the 2 hour drive to the prison just outside of Tucson.

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Jack could see the prison in the distance, distorted by heat waves in the open desert. He noted the sign on the side of the road that always made him chuckle. "Camping, 3 miles" and just below it "State Prison, Beware Hitchhikers". A few short minutes later, Jack parked the Chevy in visitor parking and hopped out of the car. His jeans sticking to his legs in the heat, he walked slowly to the guard station in front of the high brick walls and barbed wire.


	3. Chapter 2

Kate sat on the edge of the small, uncomfortable bed in her cell and glanced at the clock for the fifth time in under a minute. He would be here soon. Anxiously she got up and paced the cell. Her feet, clad in prison issue blue paper slippers, were cold as she walked over the dark cement. The air conditioning was on too high. Again.

_Where is he_? She wondered glancing again at the clock outside her cell. Pressing her face against the thick glass she looked as far as she could down the dank hallway. No Jack.

She nervously twisted a lock of hair that had come loose from her braid. Of course it had come loose, she thought bitterly, she wasn't allowed hair bands. The sort of damage she could do with a fabric encased circle of rubber was beyond her, but there was nothing she could do about it.

She wished he would just get there so she could get this over with. She wondered again if this would be the last time she saw him and the knots in her stomach tightened with the thought. She hoped the answer was no, but it was Jack. She had no idea how he would react to her plan.

"Come on" she murmured to herself as she pulled the plastic chair over to the glass wall. The chair was orange with thin metal legs and reminded Kate of grade school. I could do more damage with this damn chair than a rubber band she thought dismissively.

She sat down and tapped her foot, waiting for Jack to come again.

-----------

When Jack had first come to visit her, she had been overjoyed to see him. She had been in her cell just over a week, and already the confinement was creeping in on the edges of her sanity. He had been sympathetic and kind, but most importantly, he hadn't asked very many questions. Their visit had been short, but just seeing his face had been exactly what she had needed.

When he came again the following day, she had been slightly confused, but not ungrateful.

On the third day when he had come again with a slick lawyer in tow, she began to worry. Then he had told her of his plan. He was staying in Tucson until her trial date, and probably after that as well. He was going to pay for everything, and he was going to get her out. After hearing that, she had just been plain angry.

She could not let him do this, not Jack. What kind of life would that be? She wasn't worth it. He had other obligations. She had yelled, and he had listened with a suspiciously calm look on his face. When she was finished, he simply nodded and looked down. Then looking up at her he had said "Okay, see you tomorrow Kate."

She looked at him furiously and turned her back, not saying a word. A guard came up to Jack and reminded him that his hour was up, and with that he was gone.

True to his word, he had shown up the next day. Kate lay on her slim mattress and looked at the ceiling. She didn't respond to his hello, but he hadn't seemed surprised. He simply dragged his chair closer to the glass and spoke through the tiny holes. He talked about the inane details of his life, his cheap motel and what takeout he had gotten for dinner the night before. Kate hated to admit it, even to herself, but it was oddly comforting.

A few minutes before he left he had told her about the first time he had gone grocery shopping after getting back to LA. He had been recognized as one of the survivors by a small but pushy old woman. He remembered her because her name had been Kate too. She had followed him around the store and insisted on helping him shop. "You look thin, what you need is some carbohydrates. You're a man, you need food fit for a man!"

"Turns out she was right" he said, finishing his story, "Cause all I wanted to eat that first week was Frosted Mini Wheats. I didn't even know I _liked_ Frosted Mini Wheats."

Kate smiled up at the ceiling, hoping he couldn't see her. He stood up and turned to go. "See you tomorrow, Kate." He said softly, and again, she didn't say anything.

Kate wasn't stupid. She knew that the prison's visiting hours were only once a week. She couldn't imagine what strings Jack had pulled, what cash he had forked over, in order to see her every day for an hour. Soon he would see that it was a waste of time, and he would give up.

But there he was the next day.

Kate was in the same position she had been in the day before. And Jack still didn't acknowledge that there was anything disconcerting about it.

"Were on the cover of People." he announced with out so much as a hello. "Well, you aren't, but the rest of us are. Were on the Island, they took it right before we left. They had already taken you away. Want me to read it to you?"

She, of course, didn't respond. "Hey Kate," he said, bending down so he could speak directly into the holes, "If the answer is yes, just lay there and don't say anything, k?" he waited a beat. "Well, if you insist…."

He pulled his chair up and began to read.

_48 survivors from all walks of life are stranded on an uncharted pacific island. They must fend for themselves for over 60 days, hunting their own food and creatingtheirown shelter. Leaders emerge, tensions are pushed, and danger is a constant presence. It sounds like summer's latest reality show, but for the passengers of Flight 815, the reality was all too real._

"_The reality was all too real_." Jack scoffed. "Who writes this shit?"

Jack continued reading and Kate reluctantly pulled herself into a sitting position. He pretended not to notice the move, but she heard the slightest change in his voice.

"Alright Jack" she said walking over to the glass with her arms crossed. She tried to make it seem like she was appeasing him rather than satisfying her own curiosity, but they both knew the truth.

Jack looked up from his chair, "There's a picture of you in here too, wanna see?" His voice was pinched, as if he wanted her answer to be no.

"Mug shot?" she asked

He held the magazine up to the glass, and she saw the first mug shot she had ever taken. It was dated April 11, 1998. She had been 19 years old. The girl staring back at her looked frightened and raw. Her broken jaw was swollen and her left eye was black and blue. Or it would have been if the photograph was in color.

"Of course." She murmured. "Ill say it again, I've taken better pictures than that." Then she quickly changed the subject. "Let's see the cover."

Again, Jack pressed the magazine to the glass and Kate bent down so she could inspect it closely. Most of the people were staring at the camera with stunned looks of happiness and confusion. She located Jack and Sawyer standing next to each other in the lower right corner of the group. Sawyer looked angry, probably the angriest she had ever seen him, and she had seen him pretty furious. Jack's face was blank, but the eyes that stared out of the picture were full of emotion, an odd mixture of regret and fury. She had no trouble reading the guilt she had seen again and again in his dark eyes.

"You gonna finish reading to me?" she asked quietly as she pulled up her chair.

-----------------

After that visit, Kate no longer tried to stop Jack from coming to see her. Their daily routine had become so comforting to her, more so than he could ever know. When he was there, her cell didn't seem so small and she didn't feel the intense loneliness that pressed in on her in his absence. She didn't feel the tightness in her chest and her heart didn't race out of control. There was no blackness on the periphery of her vision and her mind was calm.

But when he was gone. When he was gone her panic was out of control, and it was getting harder and harder to reel it in. She couldn't do it anymore, and she would do anything in her power to get out. She had done it before and she could do it again.

Kate glanced at the clock again and looked down the hallway. She breathed a sigh of relief as she saw him approaching her cell. He looked remarkably similar to the way he had looked on the island, just a little less rough around the edges. His jeans and casual button down were clean and his hiking boots were new. His hair was the slightest bit shorter and he was clean shaven. She almost wished he wouldn't shave everyday. She missed his dark stubble and the way gray peaked through at his jawline.

"Hey" he said with a smile as he put his sunglasses in his front pocket. "I think Marge over there is getting a little too comfortable with the searches, if you know what I mean."

He looked at her "What's wrong?" he asked and involuntarily raised his hands to touch her face before remembering the glass.

"Nothing." she shook her head and smiled at him. Here goes nothing, she thought to herself.

The sat, they talked. They had been doing it for weeks. When Kate saw the clock hit 3:37 she went for it. She slumped slightly in her chair, then slid out of it completely. Her green eyes rolled back into her head and she arched her back, seizing uncontrollably. She balled her hands into tiny awkward fists and saliva rolled down her chin.

"Kate!" Jack shouted instantly. "Hey! " Jack called down the corridor. "Hey, can I get some help here?"

Two guards came running down the hallway. Looking at Kate, they seemed at a loss for what to do.

"I'm a doctor, let me in!" Jack demanded.

"We have a doctor on staff" one guard said looking at the other.

"He's over at Juvey today, half mile down the road."

"There's no time, let me in now." Jack said becoming more and more anxious. Kate continued to seize, sweat forming on her brow because of the physical exertion.

"She could run." One of them said.

"Look," Jack said, trying to remain calm and reason with them. "I highly doubt she can run in this condition, besides, if she did, she wouldn't get far, this is a maximum security prison, she wouldn't make it out of the hallway. Lock me in. Trust me, she's not going anywhere."

The guards exchanged a look and seemed to concede that letting him in was worse than the alternative. "Fine" one said unlocking the door. "Marge, the computer?" Apparently there was also an internal lock controlled from the guard station just at the entrance of the hallway. Marge hurried to disarm it.

Once inside, Jack heard the locks click in place as he rushed to her. He kneeled down behind her, gingerly picking up her head and turning it to the side. "Kate?" he whispered. Her spasms began to subside and she shook her head.

"Jack? What happened?" She said slowly, confusion in her voice. "How did you get in here?"

"You had a seizure, but you seem okay now. Just rest, okay?" Her head was still resting on his knees and stroked the damp hair at her temples as he looked down at her.

"She looks okay now, Buddy." The guard said into the cell, "Thinks its time you got out of there."

"Hey," Jack answered sharply, "I'm the doctor here." Then apologetically adjusting his tone, he continued "Can one of you bring her some juice?"

Marge obliged. Kate struggled to get up, but Jack stopped her, "No Kate, rest." Gingerly he lifted her off the ground and placed her in her bed. Marge slipped a plastic cup full of orange juice through a tray in the glass. Jack retrieved it. Then sitting on the edge of her bed, he leaned Kate's head back and tilted the glass to her mouth. She gulped ravenously.

When Kate was finished with her juice, the guard again suggested that it might be time to for him to leave.

"Just a minute." Kate pleaded and wrapped her arms around Jacks waist. "Thank you." She whispered. Her arms were concealed by the blanket wrapped around her shoulders and she covertly reached under Jacks shirt. She felt his body tighten, but she continued, her hand searching for his boxers just above his jeans. Once she found it, she slid a folded piece of paper between his skin and the elastic.

Jack pulled out of the hug, his eyes searching hers. She saw the slow realization come over his face and shock entered his expression. He stood up abruptly and walked to her cell door.

"You stay right there!" Marge ordered Kate as she let Jack out.

Marge lead Jack down the hallway by his arm, and he stared at Kate as he left. But for the first time, he didn't say "See you tomorrow, Kate."


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

As Jack was lead down the corridor and out of Kate's cell block, he consciously tried to walk as normally as possible. It was a difficult task to say the least. His mind was still grappling with the idea that Kate had faked everything. She was good, really good. He had believed her and he had a god damn medical degree.

And she had done it all for what? To slip him a note?

Oh God, the note. He could feel it tucked into his boxers, burning against his lower back. Or maybe that was just the memory of her fingers there. Oh Shit. What if they searched him? They had never done it on his way out, but circumstances had never been quite the same. He'd never been inside her cell before. He took a ragged breath and tried to calm his nerves.

Thankfully, the idea of searching him didn't seem to occur to the guards. He was able to walk out of the prison without so much as a backward glance from them. He pulled out his sunglasses in anticipation of the bright desert sun, but as he passed through the doors, he saw that he wouldn't need them. Huge thunderheads marred the afternoon sky, and he could see lightning flash in the distance.

He shakily started the truck and pulled back onto the highway. He had somehow gotten it into his head that if he waited till he got back to the motel to read the note, it wouldn't be so bad. If he could just wait, it would all somehow be okay.

He drove about a mile before he couldn't take it anymore. He pulled over and drew out the slip of paper. His hands trembled slightly as he unfolded what look like the back page of an old paperback. The paper was yellow with age and the writing had been done with what Jack presumed was the dullest pencil in all of Arizona. He hated to think what she had done to procure it. She had filled the entire page with her cramped, but neat script.

_Jack,_

_I hope I don't ruin everything with this, but here goes. I've never been very good at staying in one place for very long, you know this. I think the only place I managed to stay for over a few weeks was the island, and that was because I didn't have a choice. You may say that I don't have a choice now, but I do. I know I do. Jack, you've taken on such an enormous burden with me already that it seems insane to ask for anything more, but that's what I'm doing, I'm doing all this to ask for your help. I know its something I'm not very good at, but I don't know any other way to put it. Obviously, I can't tell you details at the moment, but please believe me when I say that I would never put you in any danger. Never. I know this is something that you may not be able to do, and I don't ask it lightly. So if the answer is no, I understand. Just please don't stop coming to see me. But, if the answer is yes, all you have to do is say yes. Hope I see you soon, and if not, I miss you already._

_Yours, Kate_

As he finished her letter, hard drops of rain pounded on the windshield. Even half a world away from the island, the same crazy weather patterns persisted. He would never get used to monsoons.

Before he could continue driving, he read it through one more time. Then he leaned his head back onto the seat behind him and exhaled deeply.

What felt like an eternity later, he was back in his motel. He sat at the edge of his bed, then lay back on the cheap mattress with his feet still on the ground. He lifted the letter that hadn't yet left his hand and read it a third time. By now the initial shock had worn off and he began to think of the ramifications of what the letter meant.

Of course the answer was no.

He had known her for just over 3 months. He couldn't help her **_break out of prison_**. He wouldn't do something like this for people he had known his entire life. Hell, not even his closest family members.

Plus, she would probably get herself killed in the process.

And for all he knew, she belonged behind bars.

But.

But he'd never known anyone in is whole life like he'd known her. This despite the fact that he still knew so little about her. How was that oxymoron even possible? Maybe he had never known anybody he wanted to know as much as her.

Really, he just wanted to be near her. It was what drove him to abandon everything and come out here in the first place. He had known then that this would be no picnic, and he had told himself he was in it for the long haul. After all, wasn't it commitment that made him tick?

He thought about her in her cell. How he could see her growing more and more ragged with each passing day. Even her prison uniform, which looked like oversized pale blue scrubs, seemed to hang on her diminishing frame.

And everyday he went to see her, he couldn't help feeling like Clarice Starling visiting a less creepy, more attractive, more vegetarian Hannibal Lecter. Minus all the fava beans. And illusions to slaughtering sheep. Okay, it wasn't similar at all. But visually, her cell block could have come straight from the set.

What must it have taken for her to be willing to do what she had done? Not once had he seen Kate ask for help. He couldn't deny the naked desperation he had seen in her eyes. He had never seen her like that before and it terrified him.

He thought about his life before he got on that plane in Sydney. His life before her. It was a blur of detached relationships. He hadn't always been that way, but the past couple of years it had just been easier. The people that he had committed his time and energy to were his patients. And most of them were in and out of his life within days.

Even his wife had started out as a patient. His ex-wife. Slowly that relationship had gone the way that all the others had. He had shut down, and she had left. And he had been grateful for it.

But everything had been different on the Island. His relationships there were fraught with intensity and fear and longing and joy. But at least he had felt something. Especially with her.

On the Island, there had always been a heightened push and pull between them. An electric energy that they had taunted each other with. Get close, step back. He supposed it was the dangers of their surroundings and the presence of Sawyer that had created the tension. But it had also been him. The desire to be near her had been there from the first time he saw her. But it was also coupled with his need to keep her at bay. His need to focus his energy equally among the survivors, to take care of all of them.

But over the few weeks he had been visiting her, their dynamic had changed completely. An ease had entered their regard for each other. They had suddenly and inexplicably become comfortable with each other.

Jack again looked at the note. It was only when he couldn't read it that he realized it had grown dark. Not bothering to switch on the light he reached for the phone and dialed. Pad Thai from the Thai restaurant he had discovered last week would be there within the half hour. He had just enough time to hop in the shower.

As he showered, as he ate, as he blindly flipped through the channels, his mind kept wandering over the same details.

At the end of it all, he was left with one simple truth. His time on the island or Kate, or some amalgamation of the two had fundamentally, inexorably changed him. And there was no going back. He would do whatever she wanted.


	5. Chapter 4

_I just wanted to thank you all for your lovely reviews. I cant express how much it means to me, it really maked me want to keep writing this insane, out of character story. Um, this next chapter is pretty cracked out, so I hope y'all don't abandon me, I swear the next chapter will actually make sense!_

**Chapter 4**

The next morning,Jack awoke from his restless sleep with a willing determination. He had only one thing left to do before he could give Kate his answer. Glancing at the clock, he realized it was only 6:40. What the hell, he thought, if the lawyer wasn't in his office this early, he wasn't worth the small fortune he was paying him.

Eric Brady, it turned out, was in his office. However, it took some doing to get through the chipper receptionist. "Mr. Brady is due in court in an hour and is unavailable until 3pm, would you like his voicemail?" she asked brightly. After much cajoling Jack was finally put through to him about 20 minutes later.

"You're a hard man to talk to Mr. Brady." Jack said testily.

"That I am Mr. Shepard, that I am. Now what can I do you for. I can give you about 5 minutes."

"I need to know," Jack exhaled, "What are her chances? Can you do anything for her? And no bullshit."

Eric Brady sighed deeply and waited a moment before answering. "Jack?" he finally spoke. "I'm gonna be honest with you here, man. Against my better judgment, really. I probably haven't had enough coffee yet... At any rate,I've been looking through the files and Miss Austin? She's in it deep. She killed, well murdered, a prominent, well loved resident of a very small town. There are numerous witnesses, almost all of which are willing to testify. Including her own mother. If we had some decent character witnesses it might help, but her history of petty delinquency prior to the crime didn't really help her in that respect. Of the two people willing to testify on her behalf, one is dead, and the other either is or was a drug addict and a relation. That, and usually when people run from the law, it doesn't inspire trust from a jury."

He paused, perhaps waiting for a response from Jack, but there was nothing but dead air.

Eric continued. "Now, even if I believe Miss Austin's story, which I do by the way. Im gonna have a helluva time convincing a jury. There is no physical evidence to support her claims. In this era of CSI and Cold Case, people want hard tangible proof. God damn network television." He chuckled slightly.

"Best case scenario?" Jack asked ignoring the joke.

"Best case scenario." Eric repeated. "I can probably cut a deal and get her 25 years. But if this goes before a jury, she'll probably get life. Good news is, historically jury's have had trouble sending pretty young women to the gas chamber."

"Jesus Christ" Jack muttered.

"Hey Jack, Im sorry man. I can tell you're wrapped up in this thing emotionally, and I hate to be the bearer of such bad news. But I do think that you need to prepare yourself, and her, for whats coming." He waited a beat. "You're more than welcome to get a second opinion, of course."

"No." Jack said "That won't be necessary. Thank you for your candor." And with that he placed the phone back in its cradle. It had been what he'd expected, but it was still shocking to hear it out loud.

Waiting for his scheduled visiting hours was excruciating. All he could do was go over and over in his mind his conversation with the lawyer and read again and again Kate's letter. Finally though, it was 2:30 and he set off.

As he arrived at the station just outside Kate's cell block one guard said to the other, just loud enough so Jack could overhear, "Sleeping Beauty's prince is here."

"Sleeping Beauty?" Jack asked.

"Yeah, she's been out since yesterday afternoon, right after the doctor saw her."

"What time did he see her?" Jack demanded.

"Um, just after you left?" the guard answered as if he wasn't sure. Like he didn't want to make trouble.

"Nearly 24 hours." Jack murmured to himself. "What did he give her?" he said addressing the guard.

"Don't know, but whatever it was, it worked." The guard paused in front of the door, waiting for a response from Jack.

"Wanna hurry this up?" Jack asked raising his eyebrows. He opened the door and Jack pushed passed him, jogging down the hallway to Kate's cell.

There she was, sprawled on her back, mouth agape. One hand was thrown almost recklessly off the edge of the bed. And she was snoring, rather loudly.

"Kate!" Jack yelled through the glass. No response. "Kate!" He tried again rapping pounding his fists on the cell. She only moaned and rolled over to face the wall.

Jack turned to the guard. "You're gonna need to let me in. Do whatever you need to do to get clearance. And I need the number to the nearest fax machine." As he spoke he flipped open his cell phone and called the lawyer for the second time that day.

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Kate looked darkly at Jack through the wooden bars of her cell. Night was falling in the jungle and she could just make out his features in the dim light.

"Don't worry, Kate." He told her brightly, "Everything will go fine tomorrow. You just wait and see."

"How can you say that Jack, my lawyer is ten years old! And you know," she continued, slightly puzzled, "I'm beginning to think that he doesn't really have a law degree."

"Don't worry." He repeated, "Walt catches on quick, hes a bright boy."

"Why can't you be my lawyer, you're smart." Kate whined.

The smile faded from Jack's face. "I've told you Kate, I'm far too busy. There's a lot I have to do on this Island. Everybody's depending on me."

"I know," Kate sighed. "But are you at least coming to my trial?"

"I'll try Kate," he answered, "But I still have to organize the band aids both alphabetically and by color. It's a really big deal. I'm sure you understand." The smile returned to his face.

"Alright." She said quietly, tears forming at the corner of her eyes.

"Don't cry Kate, it'll turn out okay."

"You keep saying that Jack, but I don't think it will!" she yelled "Whose bright idea was it for Ana Lucia to be judge! Shouldn't it be someone impartial? You know she hates me. Can't it be Locke?" She pleaded.

"Now now, Kate," He said "You know he's opposing council."

"I suppose so."

He continued "Even if you're convicted, the Hatch isn't so bad. We'll come and visit you! We'll even throw some fruit down when we remember!"

"But I don't want to go in the hatch."

He got up and reached into her cell, ruffling her hair like a child. "Buck up little camper!" he said and turned to leave.

"Jack!" she screamed after him "Don't let them put me in the Hatch!"

Jack turned back to face the cell and began shaking it violently.

"Kate." He said.

"Kate, time to wake up"

"Katie."

Kate opened her eyes quickly and inhaled deeply. She was back in her cell. Jack was there, crouching beside her bed, gently shaking her shoulder. "Don't call me Katie" she said sharply, coldly.

His face crumpled, "I didn't mean…I'm sorry" he said.

Kate blinked and groggily tried to recall why he was in her cell, but her brain came up with nothing.

"Oh Jack" she said, tears immediately coming to her eyes. "Im so sorry, its just Tom used to call me that, and he..." she trailed off. "Wait." She visibly tried to concentrate. "What are you doing in here?"

"Its okay," he said, "I was just trying to wake you up." He said, he reached out and traced his thumb under her eye, wiping away the tears. Her vision blurred and gradually came back into focus. He let his palm rest on her face slightly longer than necessary, but when she reached up to touch it, he moved it away. Why was it so hard to remember what was going on? It had to be the middle of the night, what was Jack doing here?

She tried to sit up, and a wave of dizziness overwhelmed her. She plopped back down on the pillow with a grunt. Jack chuckled at her, then looked slightly ashamed of it and put a serious expression back on.

The only explanation she could come up with for the extremely odd situation she found herself in was that she was still dreaming. "At least this is a good dream though." She murmured to herself.

"What?" Jack asked.

"Oh, nothing" she said in a sing song voice and closed her eyes. She could feel the bed rocking back and forth slowly, like she was back on that boat. This bed was just about as uncomfortable as that one had been.

"Oh no you don't, Kate." Jack said. "I need you to try and stay awake for me now."

"But I'm dreaming now Jack, what difference does it make if I go back to sleep?" she said rationaly.

"Right," Jack said slowly, "But I need you to pretend to stay awake, at least keep your eyes open okay?"

"That doesn't make sense." She giggled.

"Humor me." he answered. "Now Kate, can you remember what the doctor gave you?"

She cocked her head to the side puzzled by the question. "But Jack," she whispered, "You're the doctor. And you didn't give me anything, even though I _really_ wanted you too. Why are you smiling?"

"No Kate, the other doctor."

"Tom?" she asked.

"No Kate, try and remember yesterday."

"I remember yesterday, I did something really dumb. I can't quite remember what though." She said, wrinkling her forehead. "I thought maybe you wouldn't like me anymore, but I guess you do, cause you're here." She paused, thinking again. "Wait, if this is a dream, then maybe your not really here and you do hate me. You don't hate me, do you Jack?"

Jack walked over to the bed again and looked at her closely. "No Kate, I don't hate you," He said firmly.

"That's good," Kate said relieved. "I like it when you come and see me."

"I like coming to see you." He answered.

She reached out her hands and kneaded his cheeks, pursing his lips, then mushing the skin back. "You should stop shaving though, I miss you're stubble. It looked nice and scratchy."

"Okay." He said smiling. He got up and walked to the tiny holes in the glass. "Can we get some coffee in here?" He yelled.

"Is it time to wake up again?" Kate asked disappointed. Why did she always wake up before the good part?

"Kate, I need you to do me a favor." Jack said to her, retrieving a piece of paper and a pen from atop the orange chair. "I need you to sign this. It says that I'm the only physician allowed to treat you. You think that's something you can do?"

"Sure!" she said brightly.

As she signed, one of the guards brought some coffee. Jack handed it to her gingerly. "Careful, its hot."

She sipped the coffee as Jack sat in the orange chair, looking at her.

"So," she said conversationally, "You coming back tomorrow?"

"Sure am," he answered. "That should be interesting." He said under his breath.


	6. Chapter 5

**Thanks to everyone who took the time to review, it means so much more to me than you'll ever know! Now, heres an incredibly sappy chapter...**

Kate stood in the middle of her cell about three feet back from the glass, waiting. She could see her reflection in the dim glass. Her arms were crossed high on her chest, mouth a thin pressed line, brow furrowed in irritation. In one hand she held a slip of paper. She tried consciously to relax her features, but glancing back at her reflection a few moments later, the fury was again evident on her face.

She heard him approach and her heart began to beat faster. She didn't know if it was her apprehension or merely him. He came into view and noticed her grim posture. He said nothing but paused a moment and ran a hand over his close shorn hair. She could see him trying to decide how to react. As he stood there looking at the cement floor, she noticed that he hadn't shaved that morning. A flicker of memory flashed behind her eyes and a warm blush burned her neck and cheeks.

He immediately went into his daily routine, pulling the hard backed gray chair over to the glass. He looked up at her, unmoving in her cell. "Something bothering you, Kate?" he asked rather calmly, raising his eyebrows slightly.

His relaxed demeanor bugged the shit out of her. She closed her eyes and exhaled.

"Are you gonna tell me what's bothering you, or do I have to guess?" He said it condescendingly, like he was challenging her.

A small angry noise escaped her throat and she uncrossed her arms and closed the distance to the glass. She pressed the paper to the glass in front of him. "You're my doctor now?" She said coldly.

"That looks like you signature, Kate." he answered, matching her tone. He sat in the chair, arms resting on his knees, still looking up at her.

"I was chemically altered, Jack" she said, emphasizing his name in her anger, "I really don't think it will hold up in court."

"Ah," he said, a hint of a smile playing at his lips, "so you do remember."

"Vaguely," she said waving her hand dismissively in the air. "Don't change the subject." She wasn't going to let him talk her out of her anger.

He stood up, their bodies now separated by only the thick glass. His posture was almost confrontational and the energy between them was electric. He looked ready for a fight. At that moment Kate was thankful for the first time that an unbreakable pane of glass separated them. Not that Jack would ever even think of hurting her, but the distance between them was somehow comforting. She didn't have to think too much about the thick tension between them.

Jack opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it. He rubbed the wrinkles in his forehead and looked away from her. When he spoke, he looked directly in her eyes. They were suddenly dark pools of kindness and calm. "Kate," Jack asked sincerely, "Why is this such a bad thing?"

"Because Jack." She said, and paused, trying to form the right words. "Because you didn't ask, because its too personal."

"Kate, I don't want someone who doesn't fully understand your medical condition treating you. Think about why you were sedated in the first place." He said it pointedly and rationally. And she had to admit that he made sense.

She said nothing, trying to come up with a better argument against him. He stood looking at her. Finally, she said the only thing she could come up with. "You're a spinal surgeon, not a general practitioner!"

"Kate," he said, his voice low. He spoke through the holes higher in the glass, just at his mouth where he stood. She was shorter and had to crane her neck a bit to reach them. "Don't you want me to answer your other question, the one from two days ago?"

No, was her gut instinct. She didn't want to know, she shouldn't have even asked. He was still here, and that was all that mattered. "No Jack, you don't have to, we can pretend it never – "

He cut her off. "I don't want to pretend it never happened. I want to answer your question, Kate."

Her rage melted into an agonizing vulnerability. This was much, much worse. At least with anger came power. But the way he could so effectively shut down her defenses with a look and a few words was incredibly unnerving. She blinked back the tears that were already pressing against her eyes and managed a nod.

"I have one question first." He said it so low that she could just barely make out what he was saying. She realized that he didn't want any recording devices in the cell to pick up their conversation.

"Okay." She said, her voice just above a whisper.

"Did you do it?" Time seemed to slow down. She could feel the warmth from his breath when he spoke, smell the trace amount of mint from his toothpaste.

"Do what?" She asked him, stalling for time.

"You know what. What they say you did, did you do it?"

For a half second, instinct took over and she considered lying. But what would be the point, Jack could always see right through her. Besides, she didn't want to lie to him. She looked behind her to where the camera was positioned in the high corner of her cell. Then she looked at the camera to the left of Jack's head. She moved slightly to the right so the lens' view of her was blocked. She mouthed "Yes."

Jack nodded, unsurprised. "Did you have good reason?"

"That's two questions, Jack." She tried to say it lightly, but it was impossible.

Jack let out a shaky laugh. Before he could say anything in response, she again said "Yes."

"Okay then," He said slowly nodding his head. "Well, my answer would have been the same either way, but this makes it easier."

_Oh my God_, she thought, _This_ _is it, this is when I never see him again_. She tried to take him all in, to memorize his features. The way the sharp bump on his nose seemed to be perpetually sunburned. The way he stood now, his thumbs hitched in his pockets, his legs spread slightly. Long minutes seemed to pass but in reality, it couldn't have been more than ten seconds.

"I'm in." He said.

She took a step back from the glass. "What?" She asked dumbly.

"I said I'm in, the answer is yes."

She turned away from him and her shoulders tightened as a single sob escaped her lips. She brought her hands to her face and pressed the heels of her palms into her eyes until she saw dark red spots.

"Kate," he said, his voice thick, "Kate come here okay?"

She took a deep breath and shook her hands at her sides. She noticed she was still holding the paper in her hands. She let go of it and watched as it drifted back and forth to the ground. Then twisting her dark curls into a bun she turned around to look at him. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears, but his face was calm. He looked determined.

His hands were no longer in his pockets, but resting on the glass. She could see the flattened pads of his fingertips, and when she walked over to him, she brought her hands up to match them on her side of the divide.

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Just as Kate opened her mouth to speak, she heard one of the guards yell down the hall. "You two wanna break up your little conference before your Goddamned sexual tension melts the glass?"

"Sir? We're going to need you to sit down." said the female guard.

Jack smiled and looked down as he backed away from the glass. "Thank you!" the smartass guard yelled down to them.

Jack sat and looked at Kate still standing at the glass. "Now what?"

"Later." She said shaking her head. Her loose bun came undone and she pawed at her hair, trying to reshape it into the knot that had come loose. "They let you bring a pen in here, but I still can't have a fucking hairband!" she said exasperated. She glanced at Jack, he was biting his lip, trying to stop a smile that insisted on coming.

"Not a word." She threatened.

"Its just, all that time on the island, and everything in here, I don't think I've ever heard you drop the F-Bomb. There was plenty of opportunity"

"You have no idea how irritating this is. All I ask is a rubber band. This borders on a violation of my civil rights." She smiled slightly, they were both relieved that they could fall so easily back into the ease of small talk after such an intense few minutes.

"What day is it?" she asked suddenly. It was hard to keep track with so little to break up the days.

"Wednesday." He answered without having to think about it.

"Okay, Friday we'll discuss…other things." She finished lamely.

"How?" he asked.

"Friday." She said firmly.

Jack's time was just about up. He stood up slowly, reluctant to leave. "You know, I still don't know if I'm your doctor or not. Before you decide, think about how it could make certain things easier. I just think – "

"Shut up Jack," she cut him off, "You're my doctor."

She watched him smile as he exited the square frame of her view. After a few moments, she no longer heard his footsteps, and he was officially gone. She wandered aimlessly around her cell until settling on her flat mattress. She leaned back and closed her eyes. Only twenty-three hours till he was back.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

There were two regular instances during which Kate was allowed to leave her cell, always, of course, hand-cuffed and under the tight supervision of one or more guards.

First, every other day, Kate was accompanied by a surly female guard to a large tile room, given a rough bar of lye soap, and allowed to shower. This was not as bad as it sounded. Given the two months she had spent on the island sans running water, Kate would probably have been thrilled by a weekly shower. The guard usually had the decency to turn around and give Kate the illusion of some privacy. She knew the room was monitored by recording devices, but she tried not to think about that.

Second, twice a week, every Tuesday and Friday between 11 and 12 to be exact, Kate was allowed outside with the other female inmates. The grounds didn't look quite the same as they did in prison movies. There was no track, no area full of large weights, no set of bleachers. There were, however, various criminal types full of back yard tattoos and bad haircuts.

Kate usually did her best to appear invisible to the other inmates. Even as a child, Kate had been a bit of a loner. Growing up on a small farm in Iowa, miles from her nearest neighbors, she had had only two consistent playmates. Her little sister, Liz, and her best friend Tom. But her life over the past few years had cemented her solitary nature. One rarely had chances to build lasting friendships moving from place to place via back alleys and smelly buses.

When Jack had first started to come to see her, the other girls in her cell block had of course noticed the frequency of his visits. Word of her special treatment had spread quickly and Kate had narrowly escaped from some pretty vicious fights by sheer luck and the presence of the mostly uninvolved guards. But if Kate was anything, she was tough. She had known that she would have to prove to the other girls that she was not to be messed with. The next time she was outside, the first comment had come from a muscular bitter looking blond girl. Kate had punched her squarely in the mouth. The girl had been knocked flat on her back, and as she sat up, she spit two teeth out of her mouth.

"That's it, Bitch" she had said to Kate thickly as blood flowed from her mouth down her chin. She struggled to get her feet beneath her. Rather than let her get up though, Kate had kicked her in the gut, causing the woman to double over in pain, then throw up on the pavement. At that point, the guards had seen fit to haul Kate off in one direction and take the other girl to the infirmary.

Aside from a few snide comments and dark looks, the other prisoners had left Kate alone after that.

On her recent voyages out of doors, Kate had stayed mainly by the high fence, staring out through a second fence into the open desert. Anyone who had known her on the island would have noted that her stance and expression were exactly the same as when she stared blankly out to sea.

On the island, she had stared at the surf. The crashing waves were a constant force that created the illusion of movement. It was an illusion that she had latched onto. Here though, there was no movement of the landscape. The sultry heat sometimes caused shimmering heat waves in the distance, but the foreground of saguaro cactus and dry, brittle shrubs was a constant. Here, the only movement was created by the cloud filled sky. Huge thunderheads that would rush over head, changing shape and casting dark shadows over the distant mountains.

Today though, she didn't head toward the fence to stare unblinking into the distance. After the guard released her from the handcuffs, she walked over to a small group of rather severe looking prisoners. They starred at her with raised eyebrows as she approached and for a second, Kate was 13 again. But that blew over momentarily, she had a task that she could focus on, approval was not what she was looking for.

One girl, Kate assumed she was the leader of the group, was built like a linebacker. She thought her name may have been Janine, but she wasn't sure. There was a tattoo on the side of her neck that Kate didn't have a chance to read. Kate took a shallow breath, then she went for it. "Um," she asked the girl rather sweetly, "can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah Honey," the girl answered moving closer, "Anything you want."

"When you went into the Supercuts, did you have to ask special for the Mullet, or did it just sort of happen?"

The girl blinked stupidly for a moment. Then one of her friends said "Hey!" Kate felt a punch land on her cheek, and she swung blindly, making contact with unidentifiable limbs and body parts. Punches landed on her stomach and she felt herself being slammed shoulder first into the ground. She head butted the girl on top of her and tried to roll out of range of swinging fists and kicking feet. The last thing she remembered was strong hands lifting her from under her arms as she saw guards descend on the other girls.

---------------------------

Jack got the call at about 11:45. He rushed out of the diner leaving much too large a tip, he didn't have time to wait around for change.

He made it to the prison in under ten minutes, a new record for him.

The now familiar guards led him down a different hall, this one white with a number of doors on either side. The frequency of the doors made Jack think that the rooms behind them must be rather small. Stopping at a door labeled 15, one guard unlocked the door as the other one said "She's in there, we'll have to lock you in."

Jack swung the door open slowly, she was on a small bed facing away from him. The room looked uncannily like an exam room at the hospital in LA. Even the bed had the same light green leather covered with a roll of thick paper. At first all she could see was her brown hair and an arm, strapped to the metal rail of the bed with an ancient looking leather strap. He heard the door close and lock behind him and he walked over to her.

He stood by the bed and stared at her for a moment. She was a mess. Her right cheek was a deep purple and had been split. Her nose had dried blood around it. It even looked like she had been hit in the throat.

"Jesus, Kate." He whispered and her eyes flickered open. She tried to smile at him, but only succeeded in grimacing. She absently tried to bring her hand to her face but was stopped by the leather strap. He undid the straps and was surprised when the guards didn't come storming in. He looked around, searching for the cameras. "No surveillance in these rooms." she answered his unasked question. He nodded and touched her swollen cheek gently.

"What happened Kate?" he asked, the concern evident in his voice.

"The other kids don't like me." She again tried to smile, this time managing a sort of half grin.

"Can you sit up?" he said ignoring her joke. It was beginning to dawn on him that she had probably done this on purpose. He should have known.

"I don't know." She answered truthfully. She swung her legs gingerly off the side of the bed and tried to push herself up with her arm. Jack reached under her arms and pulled her gently into a sitting position. When his hand hit her shoulder blade she gasped at the pain and bit her lip.

His eyes looked at her questioning, "I think that's where I hit the ground." She told him. He nodded, his face taking on an even grimmer expression.

"What about your head? Did you hit your head?" He bent down to look at her and put his hands in her hair, his fingertips feeling her scalp for any signs of a concussion. He didn't feel any bumps, and she looked at him and shook her head.

"Why Kate?" he said as he dropped his hands to his side and stood up.

"You know why Jack." She answered. "Where else were we going to talk?"

"You could have gotten really hurt, Kate." He said. "Look at you." The lengths she would go to, it was frightening. For the first time in quite awhile it was brought home to Jack that he really had no idea what she was capable of.

"You should see the other girls." Kate said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Girls? Plural? My God, Kate." He shook his head, still baffled by the whole situation.

"Are we at least going to talk about what were here to talk about?" She asked, suddenly weary of his obvious disappointment in her.

"Take of your shirt first." He said.

"Wow, Jack, I always thought I'd have to make the first move." She answered. Her voice was a little colder than she had intended it to be.

He rolled his eyes as he helped her lift her shirt over her head. She sucked in her breath as her shoulder blade twisted awkwardly. She turned slightly to give him easier access to her shoulder. He moved the strap of her grey cotton bra off her shoulder and traced his fingers along the darkened skin, pressing slightly. He saw her involuntarily shiver as goosebumps formed on the soft flesh just above her hips.

"I don't think it's broken, just badly bruised." he said, his voice slightly pinched.

"Can I have my shirt back?" she asked.

"Not yet," he answered. "Here, lean back." He said positioning his hand at the small of her back. She put her head back down on the bed, laying flat. He placed his hands on her incredibly bruised stomach. "Tell me where it hurts."

"Um, everywhere?" she answered.

"Any sharp pain when I press here?" he said, pushing her stomach in just under her ribs. She shook her head.

"Looks like you lucked out this time, no broken bones." He told her.

"Shirt." She said, holding out her arm. He retrieved it for her. When she struggled with getting it over her arms, he helped her.

"So," he said when she was again sitting comfortably on the bed, "Whats the plan?"

"Okay," she said "I need you to call my sister at this number." She pulled another sheet of paper out from the waist band of her drawstring pants. He reached for it.

"Liz, huh." Was all he said.

"Yeah, call her and tell her you're a friend of mine from high school. She'll know what that means, then she'll call you back from a payphone, or something untraceable." She paused, looking at him.

He nodded, and she continued. "She'll be able to get you some money."

"I have money Kate."

She continued, pretending she hadn't heard him. "I'll need you to buy me some clothes, something a little less conspicuous than this." She pulled at her blue prison garb. "Some other supplies too. And if its possible, I'd like you to get me a car, something common, like a Civic, or a … a Focus. Pay cash and don't sign anything"

Jack nodded, "Then what?"

"Well, we'll have to meet somewhere so I can get the money, and the other stuff." She wasn't looking at him at all. She kept her eyes focused on the wall behind him.

He raised his eyebrows and starred at her, willing her to look back at him. "That's it?"

"Yep," she said, false cheer in her voice. "That's not too bad is it?"

"And what, I hand over the cash and never see you again."

"It has to be this way Jack." She said it firmly, finally meeting his eyes.

"No it doesn't, I said I'm in, that means I'm all in." He said it with just as much conviction that she had.

"Were not on the island Jack, You don't get to make these decisions for people." She said, her voice growing louder. She glanced at the door and continued, struggling to keep her voice down. "This is not your choice."

"Oh, it can be, if you want my help at all it can be."

"Don't do this Jack." She pleaded. "What if you get hurt? Don't make me live with that."

"I won't get hurt." He said plainly.

What about your family, your mother back in LA?"

"My mother," he said, "Is a story for another day." His voice had an edge in it that she had never heard before.

They stood starring at each other for a few moments, both stubbornly unwilling to bend. Jack sighed. "Why do you think I'm here Kate? Why do you think I come see you every damn day." He paused, and she continued to stare. "There's nothing left for me back there."

"Well, way to boost my ego Jack. Im sorry you don't have a lot going on right now, but that's no reason…"

"You know thats not what I mean Kate. You, you're it, you are the single most important person to me. I don't want to go back to what my life was before you. And I'm not letting you do this alone."

She looked down at her feet. "So basically, were just two desperate people clinging to each other because we have nothing else to cling to?"

"I can live with that." He said, smiling for the first time that day.

"Alright," she sighed, "I'll think about it" There was a sadness in her eyes that wouldn't go away.

"I guess that will have to be good enough." He said, "We should probably get you strapped back in now."

She leaned back against the bed, her knees bent. He took her wrists gently and belted them onto the railing. When she was secure he pushed her hair back from her forehead and kissed her there lightly. As he started to move away, he hesitated slightly. She stared up at him and he slid his hand behind her neck, tilting her head up. He kissed her, his tongue pressing gently but insistently into her mouth. She lifted her head and kissed him back.

"How's that for a first move?" He said pulling away. She smiled a little and turned away from him, the sadness momentarily gone from her eyes. He left one brief kiss on her bruised cheek and turned to go.


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Jack stepped out of the exam room into the hall only to have three guards push past him into the room. Before the door closed, he turned and glanced back into the room and saw Kate's ankles being shackled.

The door slammed shut and Jack moved to leave. His way was blocked by a lanky man with wire frame glasses and a stocky guard, Jack thought his name might have been Ned, but he couldn't be sure. The man with the glasses was holding a thick manila folder.

"I'm going to need to examine her again tomorrow." Jack said, looking at the guard.

Ned, if that was his name, looked at the man next to him, unsure how to respond to Jack.

Jack continued. "With out X-Rays, I just –"

"She sure has had quite a few health problems since you became her doctor." The man looked at Jack coldly.

"Do I know you?" Jack asked raising his eyebrows.

"We've never been formally introduced, I'm Alan Jameson," He said. "The prison's physician."

"I see." Jack nodded. "And is there some sort of problem?"

"Not at all." Jameson said, "Although I don't usually respond well when people question my treatment of my patients." He looked at Jack, who looked back at him expressionless, waiting for him to continue.

"I'm just extending a professional courtesy here. Katherine Austin's medical file." He thrust it a Jack's chest impatiently. When Jack continued his silence, Dr. Jameson sighed and turned his back to them, heading down the hallway. "Enjoy!" he called back sarcastically.

Jack looked at the over stuffed file in his hands, then at the guard. "I really will need to examine her again tomorrow. Am I going to need to speak to the Warden about this? And I suppose I can call my lawyer if necessary."

Ned just nodded, "I'll take care of it, Mr. Shepard."

As Jack nodded back at Ned, he heard the latch click open behind him. He moved out of the way as Kate was led into the hallway.

There was a guard at each of her elbows, and one walked behind them, his hand on his holster. Her wrists were handcuffed in front of her and there was a long chain linking them to the cuffs around the ankles. The steps she took were small and restricted, she looked down at her feet as she walked. She hadn't yet seen that Jack was still there.

He stared at her, the restrained fury evident in her tensed jaw and furrowed brow.

"Sir?" said the guard at Kate's right elbow, "Do we need to escort you out?"

Kate looked up startled and met his eyes. Her eyes looked down to the file in his hands, then back up again, puzzled.

"Sir?" the guard said again, growing more and more impatient as he was forced to wait.

"I was just leaving." He turned to go. He glanced beck at Kate when he was half way to the exit, she was staring after him, her eyes locked on the file.

------------------

Jack looked at the file, he had thrown it carelessly on the bed, not knowing what else to do with it. He shouldn't look at it, he knew she would hate that. He really shouldn't look at it. And he wasn't going to.

He picked it up and put it on the small table in the corner. The table was littered with old styrofoam cups of coffee and last nights take out. He cleared the trash around the file, dumping the remains of coffee in the sink and putting the garbage in a bag by the door for the maids.

He sat in one of the two chairs at the table. The upholstery matched the curtains and the bedspread. He stared at the file and pulled a pack of Camels out of his back pocket.

He had quit smoking five years ago. He had done it for Sarah, she hated the smell of it on him, especially hated kissing him right after he smoked. After she was gone, he hadn't picked it up again. Hell, he was a doctor, he knew better.

After Kate had slipped him that note a few days ago, he had bought a pack. He had gone into the 711 for a cup of coffee and had heard himself asking the cashier for the Camels, it had been almost instinctual.

As he looked at the file, he pounded the box against his palm, repacking the box. He pulled one out and lit it with the book of matches he had carried since the rescue. He took a slow drag and reached for the file, turning it to face him.

Who was he kidding?

He started at the back, the earliest documentation. It was all pretty standard stuff. Normal growth charts, Kate had been a little small for her age, and she had had a few earaches, but other than that, there was nothing too out of the ordinary. It was a little weird that her entire medical history could fit in one file, there must be stuff missing.

There was a form dated May 12, 1987. He did the math, Kate would have been eight years old. A Dr. Miller had seen her in an Iowa emergency room for a broken arm. The doctor had suspected abuse and filed a report with Child Services. There were a few copies of photographs paper clipped to the report. He would have known the kid anywhere, it was Kate in miniature. Her freckles were more pronounced and her curls were wilder, but she had the same flashing eyes and the petulant stare into the camera was one he had seen before. He had seen it that morning in fact.

He continued to read the report, Child Services had written it off as a household accident. He studied the pictures again. Her legs were scratched and cut, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. He was sure at eight his limbs had looked similar just from playing outside. Her arms though, he saw telltale old bruises on her upper arms. The bruises warranted further investigation at the very least. Why had they just let it go?

As he flipped further into the file, there was more of the same, except it got progressively worse. He tried to look at the file objectively, like she was just another patient. That, of course, proved to be impossible. At the same time, it was incredibly difficult for Jack to wrap his head around the fact that the things in the file were all things that had actually happened to Kate. His Kate. Not some nameless, faceless victim in the news or on television.

After one particularly bad report involving a broken nose and dislodged teeth, he had closed the file and pushed it as far away from him as his arms would reach. He rubbed the wrinkles in his forehead with the hand that wasn't holding the cigarette.

Who had done this to her, and why had nothing been done about it? He thought about what the lawyer had said, that she man she had killed had been a prominent citizen in the community. Was he the one responsible for this? And had law enforcement turned a blind eye? He had so many questions and he knew that the one person who could answer them would most likely be unwilling to. She had offered once and he had refused, he had asked once and had been refused.

He didn't pick up the file again. At the very least, if she asked he would be able to tell her that he hadn't read the whole thing.

He had to get out of that motel room and away from the file. He pulled on some shoes, pocketed the cigarettes and walked out the door. He drove aimlessly for about 20 minutes until he spotted a Bank of America and decided that he might as well do something useful while he was out.

The girl at the counter recognized him as the doctor from the crash and blushed terribly while she stumbled over her words. "How can we help you, Dr. Shepard?" she finally managed.

"Well Ashley," he answered, looking at her name tag, "I'd like to close my accounts."


	9. Chapter 8

_Thank you guys so much for the sweet sweet reviews, it completly makes me happy! about Jack smoking, i think I did it because Matthew Fox smokes and it seems kind of hot, in the story, it was supposed to be sort of a latent college rebellion thing, everyones gotta have a vice, right? I might get more into it in the next chapters. But yes, a doctor smoking is a bit ridiculous! _

_Anyway, heres the next installment..._

**Chapter 8**

Kate sat in the exam room, waiting for Jack. It seemed like that was all she did lately, wait for him. When the guards had let her into the room, they hadn't undone her shackles and she perched on the edge of the bed uncomfortably. At least she didn't have to wait long for him.

As he was let into the room, his eyes met hers, then shifted quickly away. Shit. The thing she had tried to avoid thinking about all night and all morning was brought suddenly to the surface. He had definitely looked at the file.

"Can we just pretend that this is you being awkward about the kiss?" she asked after a few more moments of him looking around the bare room. He smiled briefly and finally looked at her.

"Kate." He said, his expression growing serious again.

"I mean it Jack," she said before he could continue. "Just do what you always do, pull up a chair and tell me about your really boring day."

"Alright." He said, looking around for a chair that wasn't there. He leaned against the metal table bolted to the floor. "I closed my bank accounts yesterday."

"You didn't." she answered quietly, shaking her head. She tried to sit up straight but was impaired by the chains. "I told you I'd think about it!"

"I know you did." He answered.

"Why are you doing this, Jack?"

"I told you why I'm doing this, Kate. The answer hasn't changed in 24 hours."

She looked from him to the door, then down at the floor. "What if I'm just using you? It wouldn't be the first time you know."

He nodded slowly, "Nice try, Kate."

She sighed, "If you're doing this out of some delusional need to fix me, or save me, or, or somehow make it all better, this is not going to work."

"I'm not." But he said it quickly, as though he wanted to believe it, but even he couldn't be sure that his motivation didn't come from wanting to keep her safe.

She continued like she hadn't heard him at all, "Because you knowing about…..about me, about the file, it doesn't change anything."

She shook her head and a curl came loose from behind her ear. She raised her hands to push it back, but she couldn't reach. She brought her hands down roughly and the chains jingled loudly. He closed the distance between them and pushed the tendril back out of her face. His hand lingered on her jaw line and she looked up at him. "I'm still the same person, Jack." She said.

"I know you are." He held her gaze for a moment. "One sec." He turned from her and headed for the door, rapping loudly until a guard finally unlocked it.

"How am I supposed to examine her when she's cuffed like this?" Jack demanded. After a small argument, the guard finally relented and removed the chord linking her hand cuffs to the ones around her ankles. He refused to remove the actual cuffs though.

After the guard left, Jack examined Kate rather quickly. When he was satisfied that she was fine, he sat on the edge of the bed next to her, their legs dangling in air.

"If we do this, I'm in charge. You listen to me, you do what I say when I say it. None of this 'the dynamite's really in my bag' bullshit. Okay?" Her voice was steady and determined.

Jack nodded "Okay."

"I'm serious Jack, I need you to say it."

"Alright," He looked at her, "You're in charge. God, you're stubborn." He grinned.

She smiled back at him, "Yep, and you're controlling, but I like you anyway." She nudged him with her shoulder and he laughed a little, looking at his hands.

"Okay, now how do we do this?" he asked.

She leaned back as far as she could and pulled a small card out of the waistband of her pants. She handed it to him and he stared at it.

"This is a security clearance card, how did you get it?" He asked, astonished.

"I'm a resourceful girl, Jack." He just stared at her, waiting for a better explanation. "I pretended to trip and pulled it off a guard's belt on the way over. Of course, they'll probably realize its gone and change all the codes, but I had to do something."

"So where does this leave us? Are we going now? Cause I didn't get the car yet, and where are we even going?"

"Stuff like this, its basically dependant on opportunity. Creating opportunity and taking advantage of existing opportunity." She looked over at him, "Don't freak out on me Jack, we're not going now."

"I'm not freaking out." He said, trying to maintain his cool.

"Actually, your help might make this a little easier." She said it like she was surprised by it. "I may have an idea. What day is it?"

"Uh," Jack paused, all the days seemed to run together, "Saturday?"

Kate nodded slowly, formulating something in her head. "could probably be set up for Monday or Tuesday…" she muttered under her breath.

"You wanna fill me in on this?" Jack asked, his curiosity barely in check.

She told him her plan, or rather, the beginnings of a workable, yet not fully formed idea.

"That's so simple, it might actually work. If they let me do it. Every time I ask, it gets harder and harder to get what I need." He nodded towards the door, indicating the guards behind it.

"You seem pretty good at getting what you want." She said not so subtlety. "Did you really close your bank accounts?"

"Yeah," he said, "Why, is that bad?"

"Aside from the fact that I told you to call my sister for cash, yeah, its not good. It's a red flag that we don't really need." She said.

"I told them it was because of the crash, I'm higher profile now, need a more secure, private bank. They didn't seem to question it."

"The feds might question it though, I guess there's nothing we can do about it now."

She was interrupted by a loud rap on the door. "Two minutes!" a guard called through the door.

Jack stood up reluctantly and looked around the room for any of his belongings. Of course, there were none, he hadn't brought anything with him. He turned around to look at Kate who was standing behind him. They both stood there rather awkwardly, Jack with his hands in his pockets, Kate with her arms loose in front of her, bound by the hand cuffs. They were both thinking about yesterday's kiss and wondering how to say goodbye today.

After a pause, Jack turned to the door, "See you tomorrow." He said as he started to walk away.

"Jack, wait." Kate said, and walked the few steps to where he said. "This is ridiculous." He didn't know if she was referring to her cuffed feet or the way he had said goodbye. She raised her arms and encircled his neck. She tilted her head up to his mouth and he leaned his whole body into her. As their kiss grew heady, he slowly backed her into the wall, his arms tight around her waist.

Another loud rap on the door forced them to break apart. Kate hugged him hard as they heard keys jingling in the door. "Thank you" she said, her voice low. He nodded into her neck, then brought his head up, kissing her light and quick. He lifted her arms from his neck and backed away from her just as the guards pushed the door open.

The guard looked at Jack, he still had Kate's hands in his. He shook his head with a light smile as Jack dropped them quickly. "You crazy kids." He chuckled. "Time for you to leave Dr. Shepard."

Jack put his hands back in his pockets "Bye Kate." He said and walked out of the exam room.


	10. Chapter9 Part I

**Chapter 9 Part I**

**Tuesday, August 31st, 1:47 pm**

Jack's truck bounced along the highway as he checked his rearview mirror for the umpteenth time. There it was, the large black vehicle that was transporting Kate to a medical lab in Tucson. She was scheduled to have an MRI in just under 45 minutes.

Everything leading up to this moment had gone remarkably well. He was sure that had everything to do with Kate and nothing to do with him. She had been meticulous about the details, and he had been true to his word, he had followed her instructions to the letter.

Just after exiting the exam room, Jack had gone straight to see the warden. He explained Kate's "symptoms" rationally and calmly, her severe headaches accompanied by nausea and dizziness since the fight she had been in two days ago. Head trauma like that, especially if it wasn't taken care of immediately, could have severe repercussions. He had explained the necessary steps to eliminating any threat to her health. "I'm sure the prison wouldn't want a black mark like this on the records." He had said it without threat in his tone. Understanding the gravity of the situation, the warden had granted permission. He had done it reluctantly, but he had still done it.

Then, just like Kate had told him to do, he had told the warden that she would probably be reluctant to have the procedure done. "Don't worry" the warden had smiled maliciously, "My guards can be very persuasive, Dr. Shepard." Jack had merely nodded and excused himself. He had appointments to schedule.

This morning, he had arrived at the prison precisely at 12:45. A few minutes later he had watched as they loaded a cuffed Kate into the back of the truck. Then he had made a move to open the passenger side door. Kate had told him they wouldn't let him ride with her, but to try anyway. It would look better that way.

"Uh uh uh, Dr. Shepard," one of the guards had said to him. "Ain't no way all three of us are sitting in the cab of this mother. You can lead the way."

"Fine," Jack had said and climbed inside his old truck.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 1:53 pm**

"Okay" he said to himself, "Do it now." He pressed his foot on the gas and weaved through the sparse traffic on the highway. Soon the transport vehicle was no longer visible in his rearview mirror.

About 5 minutes later he saw a Spearmint Rhino billboard a couple hundred yards ahead of him, he pulled the truck just off the highway and into the coarse sand and weeds. After extracting the keys, he pulled a small knife from under the passenger seat and pried off the ignition. Thank god the truck was ancient. He cut several of the wires. He didn't know shit about cars, but he assumed that would do the trick. He popped the ignition back into place and inserted the keys. When he tried to start it, he heard nothing.

He got out of the truck and paced, waiting for the hood to cool enough to open. He grew impatient quickly and kept glancing at the highway, looking for the truck transporting Kate.

After a few minutes, he opened the hood and turned his face away from the heat radiating from the engine and mingling with the already warm air outside.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 2:04 pm**

He saw the truck in the hazy distance. As it got closer, he waved his hands above his head in an effort to flag them down.

It worked, they pulled up along side of the truck. Jack was relieved when he realized the placement of the truck would help hide them from the traffic speeding past them. The guard on the passenger side got out slowly and sauntered over to where Jack stood. "What seems to be the problem here, Doc?" he asked condescendingly.

Jack backed up slightly, his hands resting on his hips. "I was hoping you could tell me," he said, "It started to overheat, so I pulled over. Then I couldn't get it to start."

"Hmmm," the guard said, "Try it again."

Jack raised his eyebrows, "I told you it wouldn't start."

"I know you did, and I told you to try it again." The guard said harshly.

Jack sighed and walked back around to the driver's side. He reached in and turned the key. "Still nothing!" he called out to the guard.

He didn't respond, but turned to the other guard in the truck. "Hey Paulie, why don't you make yourself useful and check on the prisoner? That girl is never this quiet." Then he looked over at Jack. "Aren't doctors supposed to be rich? Why are you driving this shit on wheels?"

"Hey," Jack responded, his voice tight with irritation, "It was your bright idea that I drive out here, I would have been happy to ride with you guys. Then we could have avoided this whole thing. I just hope we don't have to reschedule the procedure."

The guard ignored him and bent over to examine the engine and various other car stuff that Jack couldn't identify.

He murmured to himself as he poked around, "Probably not the battery, maybe the alternator…"

Jack grabbed a wrench from the passenger seat and concealed it behind his leg as he walked back over to where the guard stood. "Can you fix it?" He raised the wrench behind his head. As the guard started to respond, Jack clocked him in the back of the head. He slumped forward and Jack caught him around his waist before he could land on top of the engine. Looking around, he dragged him awkwardly to the side of the transport vehicle sitting him upright against the large rear wheel.

He had never done anything so violent in his life, and he tried to stop his hands from shaking, but he couldn't. He dropped the wrench he was still holding on the ground and bent down to make sure the guard was still breathing. He was. He took the keys off his belt and pocketed them.

It was only when Kate screamed his name that he realized he hadn't heard her or the other guard since he'd gone to check on her. "Jack!" she yelled out again, her voice cracked with fear.

He pulled the gun from the guards holster and ran to the back entrance of the truck, his heart pounding in his ears. He saw Kate on her knees in the rear far corner of the interior of the truck. Her hands were on the chest of the guard who lay lifeless next to her.

"What did you do!" He asked. "This wasn't part of the plan."

"I – I think I killed him." she whispered, it was dark inside the truck, but there was no mistaking the sheer terror in her eyes.

He climbed inside the cabin and knelt on the other side of the guard. "How Kate?" he asked, checking for a pulse. He found one, but it was faint.

She stared at the body. "You can bring him back, right Jack? I didn't mean to, it was an accident."

"Look at me Kate!" He yelled. She dragged her eyes to his. "How did it happen?" He bent down to the guard's mouth and felt no breath.

"I strangled him with my handcuffs." She choked the words out, "I was only trying to make him pass out. Please bring him back, okay Jack?"

Jack tilted the guards head back and breathed into his mouth. "Its okay Kate, he's just not breathing, he's not dead yet." He bent back down and expelled more air into the man's chest. Kate sobbed in the background. After a few long seconds, Jack heard the man sputter and cough, and then he was breathing on his own. Worse though, he was coming to.

"Kate, the keys, they're in my pocket." He held the man down while Kate grabbed the keys and undid her cuffs.

"Hey, what the hell is going on!" Paulie said, his voice scratchy and low. Kate struggled to put the cuffs around his wrists, but finally managed. Kate grabbed the gun from Jack and held it on Paulie while they both exited the truck and locked the doors behind them.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 2:27 pm**

Jack grabbed Kate's hand as they ran towards the billboard that stood a hundred yards away. Once behind it, Kate saw the blue civic and smiled at Jack. "I know you said Focus, but I figured this would be just as good, civics are common enough, right?" He asked her.

She nodded at him and he unlocked the doors. He opened the back door and reached in, pulling out a pair of jeans and a beige tank top. "I know," he looked at her sheepishly, "Its exactly what you wore on the island, but I couldn't picture you in anything else." He shrugged handing her the clothes.

"Its perfect Jack, thank you. I mean, not just for the clothes. Thank you." She looked at him and he smiled back at her. "Now turn around and let me change, someone could see something and call the police any second."

**Tuesday, August 31st, 2:35 pm**

Jack pulled onto the highway. "Okay Kate, now what?" He asked, turning to look at her.


	11. Chapter 9 Part II

**Chapter 9 Part II**

**Tuesday, August 31st, 2:35:30 pm**

"We're going to Flagstaff" she answered plainly.

Jack glanced at her in the passenger seat. She had angled her body against the window and was playing with her hair, examining the ends. Flagstaff was the last thing he had expected to come out of her mouth. "What?" was all he could think to say.

"You thought I'd say Mexico right?" She said shifting in the seat.

Jack smiled a little, "I did have this image of the two of us on a beach in Baja. It'd be like the island, only with running water and more cerveza."

Kate giggled, they were both so relieved that they had made it through the escape relatively unscathed. And no one had gotten seriously hurt, thanks to Jack. Up to this point, she hadn't let herself think beyond the task of getting away. But now that they were here, now that he was sitting next to her, and she was wearing actual clothes, and the air conditioning was blowing her hair out in small waves, she could finally breath.

She looked at him looking at her. "Nah, they'd expect that. They've probably already notified border patrol. My friend Beth lives in Flag, well, technically she's my sister's friend Beth, she'll let us stay until I can figure something out."

"Beth who likes driveshaft?" Jack asked.

Kate looked at him, "I thought you weren't listening that day!"

He cocked his head to the side and kept his eyes on the road, "I was listening." He shifted the car into the right lane and got off the highway. "Guess we should go North then."

He was wearing sunglasses and a blue baseball cap that looked about 20 years old. She was sure he thought it was a good disguise and she didn't have the heart to tell him that the police wouldn't know what he looked like for at least a few hours anyway.

"Oh hey, I almost forgot," he said and reached behind him into a target bag. He rummaged for a bit, then handed her a package of elastic hair bands.

She sighed and closed her eyes. "Oh thank god!" she said and immediately slipped one onto her wrist and used another to gather her hair into a quick, messy bun.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 4:47 pm**

"Jack?" she said, and he glanced over at her. "I need to call Beth, and were about half way there. No cell phones." She said as she saw him reach into his pocket. "Were gonna need to pull off somewhere."

"Okay, next rest stop I'll get off. I could defiantly use a bathroom."

"No, rest stops are too empty, we need someplace crowded, where we can blend in. Stop in Phoenix." She sounded sure of herself.

"What if someone recognizes you?" He asked.

"No one will recognize me." She answered, and took the blue baseball cap from his head.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 5:18 pm**

Her hair fell in two narrow braids below his baseball cap and there was a backpack slung across her shoulders. Jack followed her into the largest mall he had seen in his life. His heart raced, this had to be a bad idea.

She stopped and turned around, waiting for him to catch up. When he reached her she took his hand. "Relax," she said, her voice low. "The people that look at us at all probably think I'm just a student."

"Uh huh." He nodded. He was still wearing his sunglasses. "What are you doing with me then, I'm way too old to be a student."

"You're my professor, you always have office hours at the mall." She answered dryly.

He cracked a smile. "What if someone recognizes me, from the crash?"

"Just keep the sunglasses on. Seriously Jack. This is fine. No one is paying any attention. Its all just Moms and kids, shopping for back to school clothes. They got their own shit to worry about." As she said it, Jack glanced at a mother and son passing them. Both looked miserable, their arms laden with bags. The boy shot angry looks at his mother, upset with her for some nameless adolescent reason. She ignored him and pressed on to their next destination. Jack sighed and relented. Kate had done this before after all.

They reached a pay phone and she dug in her pockets for change. She shook her head a little when she realized they were brand new. "Got any quarters, Professor Shepard?"

He rolled his eyes and handed her the change from his pocket.

She dialed the number and then looked at him. "Why don't you get us some coffee?" she asked, trying to be nonchalant.

He walked to a coffee kiosk a few yards away, allowing her the privacy she wanted. He was able to keep her in his line of sight as he stood in line. She smiled as she spoke, but her hand wiped tears away from her eyes on more than one occasion.

As he walked back to her carrying the two cups, she hung up the phone. "She says its fine." She told him. "But we have to wait until her ex-husband picks up her kids. He'll be there later tonight, she didn't know when."

Jack nodded, "What do we do for the next couple hours. And we are not staying here, I don't care how sure you are that no one will recognize us."

**Tuesday, August 31st, 5:30 pm**

The theater was dark and cool. The movie was just stating as they walked in and found seats.

Kate took off Jack's hat and leaned back into the cushy seats. She leaned over and whispered "Do you know how long its been since I've seen a movie?"

"Probably about as long as its been since I've seen one." He answered.

"SHHHHH" a couple behind them made it clear that they didn't appreciate the talking. They looked at each other in the dark. Kate covered her mouth, trying not to laugh.

The movie was terrible and Kate shook her leg the entire time, unable to keep still. Jack put his hand on her leg to stop her from shaking it, but when she stopped, he didn't move his hand away.

"I guess we haven't been missing much." Kate whispered again. The man behind them sighed heavily and shifted in his seat.

They had to leave before the end to avoid the mass exodus of moviegoers, and Kate seemed disappointed despite the film's inability to hold her attention while they were actually watching it. "I hate not knowing how it ends." She murmured as they headed to the car.

"Don't worry, I'm sure he got the girl" He said, laughing at her. "Your turn." he said, tossing her the car keys.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 8:32 pm**

"Jack," she said, pushing on his shoulder. "Jack, wake up, you gotta help me stay awake."

He inhaled through his nose and stretched his arms in front of him. "I'm awake, want me to drive?"

"No, I'm good, just talk to me, okay?"

"MMMkay, what do you want to talk about?" He asked sleepily.

She thought for a moment. "Why did you want to become a doctor?" she asked.

He groaned, "Ask me something else."

"Okay, but only because you helped me escape from prison."

He laughed, "I'll tell you why, its just too much for right now, okay?"

Kate nodded, "Favorite love song?"

"Don't have one." He answered.

"C'mon Jack, everyone has a favorite love song. What did you dance to at your wedding?"

"I really don't want to answer that one." He answered smiling.

"And you say I'm closed off." She said.

"It was something by Shania Twain I think, Sarah picked it. Wait, how did you know I was married, I never told you that."

"Lucky guess. Sarah, huh?" Was her only response.

"Okay, what did you dance to at your wedding?" He asked her.

"There was no dancing at my wedding." She answered "I got married in a courthouse. And how did you know I was married?"

"Sawyer told me."

Kate raised her eyebrows. "You two sure got close."

Jack ignored the comment. "If you had danced, what song."

"Van Morrison, Crazy Love" she answered with out hesitation.

Jack nodded his approval, "I always liked that guy. Okay, I thought of one. Maybe I'm Amazed.

"Ohhh," Kate replied, "Good song! Back when Paul McCartney was cool."

"Paul McCartney will always be cool." Jack answered.

**Tuesday, August 31st, 10:03 pm**

Kate felt around for the key under the mat and quietly opened the door. The room was dark but Kate was familiar with the layout. Kate felt around for a table she knew was there and flipped on a lamp. Below the lamp was a note. She read it then handed it to Jack.

_Hey Doll! Welcome home. The kiddies are with their Dad til School starts on the 12th, so you two are welcome to stay till then. Katie, I'm so glad you're here, Lizzie sends her love. Jack, if you're good enough for Kate, then you're good enough for me, I look forward to meeting you tomorrow! I work early in the am, so I won't wake you guys up, the futon is all made up. Much Love, Beth_

"You'll love her." Kate said as she dropped her few worldly possessions by the futon and crawled in. "Hit the light, will ya?"

Jack turned out the light, then he got into bed next to her. Despite his utter exhaustion after the events of the day, he was acutely aware of the her lying right next to him.


	12. Chapter 10

_so, I cant remember what I rated this story, but I guess this particular chapter would have to be at least an R. Its kinda dirty, so if your not into that, don't read the last paragraph. I think its tasteful dirt though...anyway, consider yourself warned. Also, this is pretty flufly, theres like 1 plot point, and thats it. And its pretty short. Oh well, here it is, hope you like it and sorry for the super long wait._

_Oh, and thank you so much for the sweet, sweet reviews! It makes me so happy!  
_  
**Chapter 10**

"Jack!" He heard her yell and he sat up straight in bed, throwing the covers off. Disoriented, he tried to figure out where he was. There was no time, he shook his head and ran up the stairs he saw to the right, his bare feet pounding on them.

"Kate!" he called frantically when he reached a hallway at the top of the stairs. He thought her voice had come from up here, but he couldn't be sure. "Kate!" he called again.

She stepped out from a doorway at the end of the hall. She looked intact, fresh from a shower actually. "Hey, Jack," She said calmly, "Come help me a minute."

"Jesus Kate," He said, his breathing still heavy "You trying to kill me?" He stood there a minute, trying to catch his breath and still his heart.

She poked her head out again, "You coming?" she asked, her eyebrow cocked. He followed her into the bathroom.

She stood in front of the mirror wrapped in a white towel. She had a pair of scissors in one hand and a damp lock of hair in the other.

"I thought…" He trailed off.

"You thought what, Jack?"

"Never mind, what's going on in here?" He asked.

"Whats it look like?" she said, pointing to the springy curl that landed just about chin length.

"Aww, Kate, the hair? Can't you just color it?"

"They're looking for someone with long hair, this'll be much easier. Trust me."

Without thinking, he reached out and tugged on the curl, watching it bounce back into place. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. "What do you need me for?" He asked quickly.

"I need you to cut it." She said holding out the scissors. "I don't think I can make it even."

"What?" He asked, backing away from her slightly, his hands on his hips. "That seems like a really bad idea. Shouldn't we wait for your friend to come home? I'm sure she can do this."

"You're a surgeon, Jack, aren't you good at cutting things?" She took a step towards him, still holding out the scissors. "Besides, you promised to do whatever I told you to. We had a bargain."

"This doesn't count, and you know it." He answered. She just stood there, one arm crossed over her chest, the other still holding the scissors.

He sighed, "Fine."

He took the scissors from her and stood directly behind her facing the mirror. "If I fuck this up…" He said, meeting her eyes in the mirror.

"I won't get mad." She answered. She reached for the brush on the counter and handed it to him over her shoulder.

He brushed her wet hair flat and gathered a small chunk from the back and took a deep breath. Kate's eyes were closed and her nose was scrunched. "Wait." She breathed just before he closed the scissors.

"Oh thank God." Jack said, lowering the scissors.

"I just need a minute, you're not off the hook yet." She said, her eyes still closed. She took a deep breath and leaned her head back into his chest bringing her hands to her face. After a few moments, she shook her head slightly and straightened herself up. "Okay, do it now before I chicken out."

He was careful, but quick, his fingers moving deftly over her hair. In just a few minutes it was over. He reached around her to put the scissors and long locks of hair on the counter.

"Turn around." He told her. When she did, he pulled on the sides of her hair, making sure it was even.

"Okay?" she asked.

"You tell me." He said, turning her shoulders to face the mirror again.

She leaned in over the sink, examining herself closely. She scrunched up her face. "I miss my hair."

"Hey, I was against this from the beginning." He said defensively.

"Its not that," She told him. "Its just, all those years before, I never had to cut it. It just makes everything seem so permanent." She sighed "It's just hair, right?"

She turned back around to face him, "Was it worth it? Do I still look like me?"

"Well, its definitely different." He answered, his eyes shifted back and forth, taking her in. He reached out again and pulled on a curl. "Actually, its kind of cute."

She smiled at him then shifted her eyes down. "I got your shirt all wet." She stated blankly.

He looked down at the shirt he had been wearing since yesterday, there were damp spots he hadn't noticed. Probably from just before, when she had leaned into him. "No big deal." He said.

She didn't respond, just reached up, unbuttoning the top two buttons. He inhaled sharply when she didn't stop, moving on to the third button. He watched silently as her fingers moved down the shirt, then she pushed the shirt off his shoulders. He took a step forward and closed the distance between them.

She kissed him as he struggled awkwardly out of the shirt. When he was free of it, he put his hands in her damp, now short hair.

She had one hand around his neck while the other unhooked the towel she had been wearing. It fell to the floor at their feet. She moved her arms around his waist, pulling him tighter to her. Her hands lingered at the white band poking through the top of his low slung jeans. She smiled into their kiss and broke away briefly. "Never took you for a briefs man, Jack." She said as his mouth trailed down her neck.

"Boxer briefs." He said into the hollow at the base of her throat. She laughed and he could feel the vibration of it on his lips.

"Better." She said as her fingers traced the 5 inked on his shoulder. She could only feel the tiniest difference in texture there.

His hands left her hair and moved down her back. His palm traveled around her waist and down her flat stomach then further down between her legs. He moved his fingers slowly and she shifted her weight, leaning back into the counter. Jack tilted his head back from her neck and jaw and ear and hair to look at her face. He saw her pupils dilate before she closed her eyes. Her irises tiny green halos around the growing black expanse. Her breath caught and clicked in her throat before she exhaled softly and her body sank into his hands.


	13. Chapter 11

_Okay, so this chapter is more interim fluff, but I swear, things will actually start happening next chapter! Thanks for the lovely reviews guys, made my week!_

**Chapter 11**

She rested her chin on his chest as his fingers drew lazy circles on her shoulder blade. She could barely recall how they had made it down the stairs. Just a tangle of limbs crashing into walls and railing. It was a miracle neither of them had gotten seriously hurt.

She looked at him, his breathing was shallow and his eyes were half closed, but he held her gaze. Neither of them spoke in a vain effort to keep reality at bay. The bar under the futon mattress dug into her thigh, but she didn't move.

Eventually, and sooner rather than later, they were going to have to deal with all of this. He brought his hand up and fiddled with the ends of her short hair, flipping it back and forth over his fingers.

Late summer light filled the room and a breeze with just the tiniest hint of fall pushed the curtains away from the open windows.

Jack looked at her hip poking out from beneath the sheet. He ran his thumb along it lightly and she turned to see a bruise forming there.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled his voice was sleepy but sincere. As she brought her hand up under her chin she nodded at him. She didn't speak, trying to hold onto the quiet. But he had already broken the silence.

"Kate." He said, his eyes were so dark she couldn't read them. It didn't matter, she was familiar enough with that particular cadence of his voice. She hadn't heard it much since leaving the island, but she knew whatever he was about to say, she wasn't going to like it.

She turned her face away from him, pressing her cheek into her hand. "Yeah?" she murmured noncommittally.

"What do we do now?" he asked.

She sighed and pushed herself off of him. She lay back, pulling the sheet up over her. "Now, you get up and take a shower while I find us something to eat."

"Were going to have to talk about this eventually." He said, echoing her thoughts from just moments before.

"I know, Jack." She said turning to face him, "Just not today, okay?"

He said nothing for a minute, just creased his forehead and finally nodded, resigned to figuring things out on her time.

"Seriously Jack, take a shower." She said it lightly, alleviating the tension that had rested between them. She pushed his shoulder in an effort to get him to move. "Really, you're starting to smell."

He grabbed her wrist and waist and pulled her to him, rolling on top of her. "You didn't have a problem with it a few minutes ago."

"Actually, I'm just incredibly polite." She answered, a grin playing on her lips.

"No ones that polite." He said, tilting his mouth to hers.

She turned her face away from him and his lips landed on her jaw.

"Yeah, brush your goddamn teeth too." She said giggling.

He stared at her for a minute, then breathed a small laugh. After a light kiss on her cheek, he pushed himself off her and pulled on his boxer briefs. She watched as he headed up the stairs, then she rummaged through his luggage looking for something to wear. She saw the clothes he had bought her folded neatly next to his in the duffle bag. She borrowed one of his t-shirts and slipped on a fresh pair of jeans. Then she set about straightening up the room. She folded the sheet and blankets and closed up the futon.

When she retrieved his jeans from the midway up the staircase, she felt herself blush as the morning came rushing back to her. He had been so intense, so focused, and he had kept his eyes locked on her almost the entire time. It had been unnerving, but strangely intoxicating. And while she had tried to maintain his level of intensity, she had found it impossible. It was too much, and she had to look away. Had to retreat to a place where the only thing that existed was their bodies and her own fierce need. But he had forced her back to him time and time again. And eventually, she had given in to his focused energy and concentration and let him lead her to a place she couldn't ever remember going to.

As she headed back down the stairs, she felt something unfamiliar inside his pockets. Reaching in, she retrieved his pack of camels. She stared at them for a minute, completely puzzled. She couldn't wrap her mind around Jack smoking. Finally, not knowing what else to do, she put them on the table next to the futon and threw his jeans in a pile with her clothes from the previous day.

------------------------

When he came down the stairs, she was standing at the kitchen counter eating dry cereal from the box, reading the newspaper. Her hair was slightly askew, as though she had slept on it wrong. He was taken aback by how very normal it was.

He headed towards her, but his eye caught his camels first. He glanced at her and knew that she had seen him look. Neither of them said anything.

He stood next to her at the counter and grabbed a handful of crunch berries. "So, why does Beth get to call you Katie?"

"What?" She asked, clearly she had no idea what he was talking about.

"Beth," He answered. "In her note she called you Katie. You told me only Tom could call you Katie."

"When did I say that?" She asked as she turned to the fridge to refill a glass with orange juice.

"That day, the day after you had the 'seizure,' you know, when you were…chemically altered."

"Oh," she said, "Um, well Beth knows me through Lizzie, and Lizzie and Tom both called me Katie, so Beth calls me Katie." She handed him the glass of juice. "Why do you want to know?"

"I'm just curious Kate, why don't you want people to know about you?" He asked, his eyes locked on her.

"Alright Jack, since were sharing, when did you take up smoking?" She asked, staring right back at him.

"Okay," He said, "That ones easy, it was a latent rebellion thing. I started in med school, mostly just to piss off my dad."

"Its so counter intuitive, a smoking Doctor." She said.

"Hence the rebellion part." He smiled. "I quit though, I only bought the pack after you slipped me the note."

"I knew I freaked you out." She said.

He moved close, putting his hands on her hips. "You don't freak me out."

"I made you start smoking, Jack." She leaned back away from him, averting her eyes.

He leaned closer. "I thought smoking turned you on. Sawyer smoked."

"Shut up." She said, pushing his shoulder away lightly.

He leaned in again, nuzzling her neck. "Don't I smell good enough for you?" He asked as he slowly kneeled in front of her and began unbuttoning her jeans. She ran her hands over his close shorn hair as he slid down her pants. He looked up at her briefly, "Love that shirt on you by the way."


	14. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Jack stood in the hallway looking at an enlarged photograph on the wall. "Is this your sister?" he called to Kate in the living room.

No answer.

She sat cross legged on the couch flipping through channels. She sped past CNN, MSNBC, especially FOX News, and lingered on the Discovery Channel. She could deal with the News tomorrow.

"Kate? Did you hear me?" Jack asked, leaning in the doorway that led into the hall.

"Hmmm?" she asked, not even bothering to look up.

He smiled to himself. "You're channel surfing? Really?" he asked.

"What else am I supposed to do?" She asked, eyes still glued to the television. "Can't go outside, and we seem to have exhausted the only other indoor activity I can think of."

"Not necessarily…" He said playfully, trying to extinguish a wide grin.

She raised her eyebrows, finally dragging her eyes away from the screen "You're kidding, right?"

He laughed, "I'm just saying that it seems kind of uncharacteristic for the girl that supplied the entire island with fruit to be sitting in front of the TV watching…" He leaned further into the room to get a better view of the TV. "What is that?"

She tilted her head to the side, "Its one of those fish that live on the bottom of the ocean, the kind with no eyes but bright antennae" She tilted her head the other way, "Or it could be something microscopic? I don't really know. Someone keeps talking over the narrator." She said, looking back at him pointedly.

"Oh, well if you're invested" He shrugged his shoulders and turned to walk back down the hall.

"Wait." She sighed, "You got something better to do?"

"Yeah, come here a minute."

She set the remote down slowly and sighed again "Alright." When he turned to walk down the hallway, she smiled.

They reached the photograph nestled between other candid shots of two adorable happy looking toddlers.

"Oh my God, I can't believe she has this out!" Kate said, covering her face. She looked at the picture of three smiling teenage girls, her face squished in between the other two. One of them, she couldn't remember who, had held the camera at arms length and taken the picture, ithad come out remarkably well.

"That's obviously you," Jack said, examining the photo, "Is this your sister?" The girl he pointed to looked so similar to Kate that they had to be related. The girl's eyes were more blue than green, and her dark hair was straight. But they had the same petite nose and slightly lopsided chin, and definitely the same freckles.

"Uh huh." Kate nodded, smiling a little. "That's Liz, the other ones Beth" Kate said pointing to the girl on the left with short blond hair. "I was a senior in high school when that was taken. Beth and Liz were juniors."

"Wheres Liz now?" Jack asked lightly, trying consciously not to press her for more than she wanted to give.

"Just outside San Diego, with her husband." Kate answered, not taking her eyes of the photo.

"You must miss her." He said, noticing Kate's wistful smile.

"Yeah," she said, her voice low. "Its funny, we fought like cats and dogs as kids, but now…" Her voice trailed off.

"You'd do anything for her?" He asked, finishing her abandoned sentence.

"Yeah, I guess." She said, glancing over at him. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?" She asked.

"Nope, only child." He said.

"Well, that explains a lot." She said laughing.

"Hey!" He said with a smile as he reached over and rubbed her neck, kneading the tight muscles just below her hairline.

--------------------

When Beth got home later that evening, Jack and Kate were sitting comfortably on the couch watching the discovery channel. It was a surgery show and Jack was explaining to Kate what the surgeons were doing. He had even put the mute button on so as not to be interrupted by the narrator.

Kate's face was turned away from the TV, Her hands covered both eyes and she peeked out through a slit between her fingers. "I'm serious Jack, change it!"

They heard a key in the door and Jack stopped mid sentence and froze. Kate got up slowly. The door opened and Kate brought her hand to her heart and exhaled.

"Beth!" She exclaimed happily as the blond woman at the door shrieked "Katie!"

They hugged tight and as they both broke away Beth looked at Kate's hair. "Oh sweetie, who did this to you?" she asked, laughing.

Before Kate could answer, Beth turned to Jack. He was standing awkwardly with the remote in his hand. "You must be Jack." She said warmly and stuck out her hand, "I'm Beth."

Jack smiled and shook her hand. "Nice to finally meet you Beth." He said, "And that" he pointed at Kate's disheveled hair, "was her idea."

Beth laughed. "Layers, Hun." She said, "With curls like that you've gotta have layers."

"Eh." Kate waved her hand dismissively, "Forget about the hair, tell me how you've been."

After a bit of catching up and some getting to know you pleasantries, Beth stood up "I'm starving." She exclaimed abruptly. "Jack, why don't you fix us up something to eat while I go upstairs and fix our girl's hair."

"Um," Jack said reluctantly, "I'd love to, except that I don't exactly cook. I can order take out though. I'm really good at that."

"With a fridge full of perfectly good food? Nope. Everyone can cook something."

Jack looked at Kate, she shrugged. "Beth doesn't really take no for an answer." She said as she stood up and headed toward the stairs. "I'm sure you'll be fine."

"Yeah, and we'll come down if we smell burning or hear screams of pain." Beth added as she pulled Kate's arm up the stairs.

Beth whispered something in Kate's ear and she stopped at the top of the stairs, looking down at Jack standing confused in the living room. She smiled at him, "He is, isn't he." She said as she gave him a small wave and then disappeared off the landing.

Thirty minutes later they emerged from the bathroom and Jack had made dinner to the best of his ability.

Three plates sat on the dining room table, a sandwich atop each one. There were also three wine glasses filled with red wine.

"Ohh, fancy!" Beth said as she and Kate entered the dining area just off the kitchen.

"It's not exactly cooking, but I do make a killer sandwich." Jack said, as he leaned over and gave Kate a kiss on the cheek. He looked at her hair, the way it fell softly just below her jaw, exposing her delicate neck. "Much better." He said to Beth as they all sat down.

The three of them talked and laughed and drank too much wine until late into the night. At around Midnight, Beth excused herself, she had an early day the next morning.

Jack and Kate followed suit. The two of them unfolded the futon and made the bed, then they both crawled in, tired and content. Jack scooted over to her side of the bed and wrapped his arms around her, pressing his chest and stomach lightly into her back. She felt him kiss her lightly on the back of her neck, then a few minutes later, his breath grew shallow and regular. She wanted so badly to hold onto this comfortable happiness that felt all too fleeting. But the wine was swimming in her head, making her sleepy, making it hard to stay awake and absorb the complete bliss she was feeling, and in just a few minutes, she was out.

----------------------------

Jack pounded down the stairs fresh from his late morning shower. "Hey, I have an idea." He said to Kate sitting on the unmade bed, remote in hand, still wearing the shirt she had slept in.

She turned to him slowly, her face a mixture of shock and dread. "Jack." She whispered.

He turned to the television and walked slowly to the edge of the futon. A photograph of his mother's face filled the screen, a reporter talked in a small box on the bottom right.

"Again, " He said, his voice aloof and unfeeling. "Ms. Shepard's condition was not immediately known." The reporter glanced quickly at his notes. "We do know that she is being treated at Saint Sebastian Hospital in Los Angeles for what appears to be a narcotic overdose. We can only presume that this apparent suicide attempt is in response to a story that we at CNN have been covering since early yesterday morning." The image of his mother was replaced by a split screen. One half was a picture taken from one of Jack's hospital IDs, the other was one of Kate's mug shots.

The reporter continued. "Dr. Jack Shepard, the son of Margot Shepard, is wanted for questioning in connection to the escape of this woman, a Katherine Austin. Both Dr. Shepard and Miss Austin were the survivors of Oceanic flight 815. At this point, they are considered armed and dangerous. If you have any information as to their whereabouts, please contact the Federal Bureau of Investigation at the number scrolling below."


	15. Chapter 13

_Alrighty, here it is, 2nd to last chapter. I hope its not too angsty, I may have gone a little overboard..._

**Chapter 13**

He sat down hard on the edge of the bed, facing away from her. The towel in his hands dropped to the floor. Dimly he could hear the reporter in the background. He was saying his name. Was this actually happening?

He shook his head and gave a short, bitter laugh.

"Jack?" he heard from behind him. He heard the bed creak, then he felt her hand on his shoulder. "Jack, I'm so sorry. I never should have…" Her voice cracked and she didn't finish the sentence.

He turned his face to look at her. "This is not your fault. This is her fault."

"What?" She said, withdrawing her hand. They were both quiet for a moment. Then she spoke softly, "Jack, your mother, she tried to kill herself."

"I know that, Kate. I saw the same story you did." He was almost condescending.

Kate sat back on her knees, "I don't understand."

"You don't know my mother." He said plainly.

Jack was well aware that he had father issues. But at least his father had tried to be a parent, even if he had sometimes gone astray in his efforts. He had tried to instill something of himself in his son, tried to steer him in a general direction. His mother, on the other hand, was a different story.

She had been cold and distant for much of his childhood. Here and there, the odd moment of affection she would offer only served to confuse him. Occasionally, she would even seem to forget that she had a child. His appearance downstairs for breakfast or asking for a glass of water at night would almost catch her off guard.

But most of the time, she had just ignored him. She was almost Victorian in her regard for him, noticing only his flaws in decorum and presentation. He had grown older walking on eggshells around her.

Eventually, he had come to believe that she was a woman so enamored of her husband that there was simply no room for anyone else.

After the plane crash and subsequent rescue, Jack's mother had latched onto him. Cleaved to him as though drowning. He could only guess that this was because his father was gone and she didn't know what else to do or who else to turn to.

It was funny, as a kid, he would have done anything for her approval, or for even a minute of her attention. But back in LA after the rescue, every time she had spoken to him one incredibly distinct memory had come back to him. It had taken on a kind of mythic quality, as though this one memory was representative of their entire relationship.

The day he had gotten the shit kicked out of him defending the boy who would one day be his best man, he had come home and found her in the kitchen. He had stood there, bruised and beaten, waiting for her to turn and see him. When she had finally turned around, she had appraised him unflinchingly. "You father is waiting for you in his study." She had said. As he had turned to head down the hall, his mother had stopped him. "Jack." She said. He turned silently to look at her out of the eye that wasn't swollen nearly shut. She calmly retrieved a white dish towel from a drawer and walked toward him. "Don't get blood on the carpet." She had said, handing him the towel.

This was all too much to unload on Kate at this point, so he gave her a brief, unemotional rundown of his relationship, or lack thereof, with his mother.

She listened and nodded sympathetically. "But she's still your Mom, Jack." She said sympathetically.

"I know." He said, rubbing the wrinkles in his forehead.

"You know you have to go see her, right?"

"Yes." He said, and looked away from her. "I know."

"We can leave whenever you want." She said.

He stared at her and for a half second he entertained the thought of taking her with him. He was beyond moved that she would even suggest it. But then the gravity of the situation made it clear. "Kate, you can't come," He again looked away from her. "It's far too dangerous."

"They're looking for you too, Jack." She said.

He couldn't argue with the logic. "I'll have to turn myself in." he stated simply.

"I'm pretty sure that's a bad idea. I don't think they let people who aid prisoners in escaping see their ailing mothers." She thought for a minute, there had to be a better way. "When you hit the guard, did he see you do it?"

"I don't think so, why?"

"Did he see you with the gun? The other one I mean, the one who you saved?" She asked.

"I don't know. I think you took it from me, but I can't remember when." he answered, waiting for her to fill him in.

"Its worth a try anyway." She said. "Better than the alternative."

"Ya gotta help me out here, Kate." He said as he raised his eyebrows. "What the hell are you talking about."

"You have to tell them you weren't involved. That I used you and took you hostage." She said it quickly.

"They'll never believe that. What are you, 110 pounds?"

"They'll believe it if I had an accomplice." She thought a minute. "Use the name Alex Dodd." She looked at Jack who stared back at her in utter confusion, "My ex-husband. One more spot on his record won't kill him."

"And what? I just happened to escape after my mother tried to kill herself?" He asked.

"Tell them I let you go because we didn't need you anymore. I could use the points, and they'll know its not out of character. "

It took him a minute to fully wrap his head around the whole plan. She was scary good at this stuff. And she thought so quickly. He never would have been able to come up with something like this in the span of just a couple of minutes. No wonder she had survived on the run for so long, she was almost built for it.

------------------------

Jack retrieved a chair from the dining room table and dragged it to the center of the living room. The gesture was so similar to what she had seen him do countless times visiting her at the prison that it was startling. The memory of it was so strong, so evocative that she was actually back there with him for a minute, staring at him through thick glass.

He sat down and griped the sides of the seat. She walked over to him, positioning herself so she was standing directly in front of him. She leaned in and kissed him, quick and soft, then stood again. She stared at him for a moment, holding his gaze just longer than necessary. He noticed her hesitation and she saw his features harden, his eyes becoming stern and unreadable.

"Don't pretend that part of you isn't relieved that I'm going." He said coldly.

She took a step back, her mouth slightly agape. He flinched almost imperceptibly at the hurt on her face.

She said nothing and he continued, "Lets face it, this never would have worked anyway." She squinted a little and nodded slightly. Then slow realization dawned on her face. He was baiting her.

"Oh Jack," she said, her voice low, "You don't have to. It won't make this any easier and it'll just make it harder when your not here."

He swallowed hard and nodded. When he looked up at her, his eyes were bright and glassy and so dark.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Ready." He answered thickly. Then she punched him. The girl could throw a punch and blood immediately began to pour out of his nose, dripping onto his gray t-shirt.

Kate reached out gingerly, but didn't touch him. "I'll get a towel."

As she moved toward the kitchen, Jack grabbed her wrist and shook his head. "Finish it first." His voice was muffled and he sounded far away.

She pursed her lips and nodded. She hit him again and again, his cheek, his mouth, even his eye. And then she stopped. He held it together throughout, but towards the end he couldn't help but let a groan escape. When it was over, he released his tight grip from the seat beneath him and slumped back, his breathing erratic.

She found part of his face, near his right ear, that wasn't starting to purple, she put her hand there gingerly and looked into his eyes. "You okay?"

"No." he said and tried to smile.

She nodded. "Let me get you a cold compress."

As she ran two hand towels under cold water, she saw her hand trembling and tried to steady it. Her knuckles were raw and cracked, and she opened and closed her fist painfully. As she walked back to him she shook her hand, but the shaking continued.

She cleaned the blood from his nose and a place on his cheek where the skin had split open. He stared at her as she concentrated and tried to be as gentle as possible. Then she placed the clean towel on his cheek and he closed his eyes and exhaled deeply. She held the towel there, and he felt the coolness of it penetrating the pain, alleviating it if only momentarily. She was bent over awkwardly and as she moved the towel over to his other cheek she straddled his lap, getting a better angle.

They sat like that for awhile and when she finished with the compress, she grazed his lips with hers so tenderly that she wasn't certain if they had actually touched. "I'll run upstairs and get you some aspirin." But before she could get up, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight to him. He pressed his lips against hers and opened her mouth with his. And it hurt like hell, but he just kissed her harder. Because it least he was feeling something, and who knew when he would again.

She pulled away, "Jack?"

He didn't answer, just pulled her too him and found her mouth again. He stood up and she wrapped her legs around him. He carried her to the bed and she felt his comforting weight on her, and they both gave in and held each other tight, like this moment would have to carry them through the foreseeable future.

-------------------------

She walked him out to the blue civic. He had wanted her to stay inside, but she had insisted. "Gotta try out the new hair sometime." She had said.

They stood at the car, neither of them had any idea what to say. Jacks hands were empty, he had left his luggage inside. Didn't really have a use for it now and how would he explain it to the police? He stuck them in his pockets, not knowing what else to do with them.

"Tell Beth I said thanks." He said finally.

"Kate smiled, "Ill let her know." She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight.

When they both broke away, he kissed her quick and looked at her hard. "You know I'm in love with you, right?"

Tears stung in her eyes and she blinked them back. She nodded, "I know." And then the tears were streaming, it was no use trying to stop them.

He brushed the tears from under her cheeks with both palms. "Okay." He said and reached for the car door. He stopped just short of the handle. "I almost forgot." He said. Reaching into his pockets he pulled out a slip of paper that she recognized from the pad by the phone. "Heres everything, all my numbers and my address. The address of the hospital, even my friend Mark's number."

She took the list and looked at it. "Jack, all of this is traceable, it might be difficult."

"I know, but its all I have right now." He shrugged.

She nodded. "It will work, I'll find a way."

"Bye." He said, opening the door and sliding in.

"Bye." She said and she watched him pull out of the driveway and drive down the street.

He headed south west, toward the California Mexico border. He would turn himself in there, and soon she would head east, trying to throw them off any trail that they might infer from Jack's location.

As he drove away from her, the landscape changed. The pine trees and crisp air of Flagstaff melted into the red rocky structures of Sedona, to the dry heat of the open Arizona desert. The further he got from her, the emptier and uglier it seemed, until finally he was in the unforgiving expanse of El Centro California.


	16. Epilogue

_So here it is, final chapter. As of right now there are no plans for a sequel, but I already miss writting it, so we'll see._

**Epilogue**

6 months. It had been 6 months since he'd seen Kate standing in that driveway, growing smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror.

Of all the really difficult things he had had to do since meeting her, that may have been the hardest. And after that, it hadn't gotten much better

When he turned himself in, he hadn't gotten much trouble from the police. But it hadn't exactly been a warm reception either. The fact that Kate had beaten his face to a bloody pulp had apparently helped. It turned out that she'd actually broken his nose. That in combination with his near perfect record had worked in his favor. Eventually, they had believed his story. One of the policemen questioning him had even said, "That Alex Dodd sure is a piece of work, isn't he." This only made him wonder what Kate had gone through with him. Yet another piece of her life that he wasn't privy too.

And then they had let him go. He had been expecting much worse.

Seeing his mother though, that had been terrible. There was really no other word for it. The cold, aloof woman from his childhood had looked so old and so tiny in that hospital bed. He had actually felt sorry for her. And she had smiled when she saw him. He couldn't remember one instance from his childhood where he had been the cause of her joy. She had recovered nicely and was actually still living in his home. He tried to maintain a comfortable distance from her, so she wouldn't rely so heavy in him, and he still couldn't fully trust her. He wasn't sure that he ever would. But other than that, it had all seemed a little too easy.

But then, finally unoccupied with personal responsibilities, the agonizing wait had begun. He has taken his job at the hospital back just so he'd have something to keep his mind in check. Something he could focus on other than his ever present worry.

-----------------

It had been 6 months and he had heard nothing. She hadn't made contact with him. He had known it would be difficult for her, but he should have heard something by now, right? He also hadn't heard anything on the news. He supposed this was a good sign. It meant that she wasn't captured or dead.

He googled her everyday. He did it every morning when he woke up and he did it again late in the day (or rather late in his shifts). He did it from his office when he was exhausted from his long shifts and the day's surgeries. When he should have been wrapping up is paper work, packing up to leave, getting home to his empty bed.

About a week ago his search had unearthed an article from a small Iowa paper. At first he had though it may have been an obituary and his heart had stopped. It had turned out to be just a story about her that had no new information. He presumed it must have been a paper from where she had grown up. They probably dug up the story every few years just to sell more papers. Other than that, nothing.

6 months. He had now officially been apart from her longer than he had known her.

Why then was he still so attached to her? Why did he think about her all the fucking time?

Most mornings he woke with a physical ache for her. His body crying out for hers in a way he had ever experienced.

Of course women had shown interest. That had never really been a problem for him. Mostly they were women from the hospital, it was really the only place he was when he wasn't crashed out on his couch in front of bad TV. He attracted a certain type of woman, a woman who liked a challenge. Women who liked fucked up men with sad eyes. He did not return their interest. Didn't even once consider going home with one just to assuage his own base physical need. After Sarah had left, that hadn't been the case. But what was the use of a warm body if it wasn't her warm body.

Sometimes he wondered if she had meant more to him than he had to her. He knew it was possible. And sometimes he believed it. Oh, he knew she cared, but did she care enough? Did she care enough to find her way back to him?

If you didn't count the island, where things had been chaotic beyond all reason, where survival was all he had really focused on. And if you didn't count prison, where they had been monitored constantly and where Kate had been focused on staying sane and getting out, they had really only had two days. Two days where they could be themselves and be comfortable just being with each other. And then his mother had happened.

Was that really enough time? But then he realized that he had known from their first days on the island that their connection, their ties to each other would always be so important to him.

He remembered everything. Images of her and events they had shared would come to him at odd moments of the day. When he threw on his light blue scrubs for surgery, he thought of her in her prison uniform. It was almost the exact same shade of blue.

When he was in the grocery store and saw guava in the produce section, he thought of giving her the seeds that day in the caves. He thought of that smile that had been just for him, and the way she looked in Sun's garden.

In the cereal aisle, when he past the crunch berries he thought of sex with her in Beth's kitchen. How she had breathed when he had his mouth on her and his tongue running over her, lingering on that tiny delicate ball of nerve endings. How she had trembled and gasped. How she had hit her head on the counter when she slid down to him on the floor. How he had been so concerned but she had just laughed at herself.

A few days ago, he had seen a kid in the waiting room clutching a toy airplane. He thought of opening the case with her. He thought of yelling at her, begging for just an ounce of truth, the smallest insight into who she was. It had seemed so important then, to know what she had done. The truth was, he didn't know much more about her now. There were still so many unanswered questions. But it mattered so much less now. The only thing that mattered now was that she was okay.

He remembered everything, everything but one thing. He kept running the conversation over and over in his head, but he could not for the life of him remember what she had said. He remembered being surprised that she knew he had been married, and he remembered that he hadn't been able to come up with an answer at first, so he had asked her. He remembered thinking that he couldn't top her song, it was a great song. And he remembered he'd finally come up with _Maybe I'm Amazed_ – which was a really great fucking song.

But what the hell had her song been? And why was it so important that he remember it. He'd been thinking about it for days now.

It was January 23rd, and he was driving to the hospital through thick, Southern California rain. The kind of rain that made traffic slow to a near stop, not because it was too heavy or dangerous, but simply because people in LA had no idea how to drive in the rain. And he was thinking about it again, he could almost hear the chorus, it was right there, then it slipped away again.

With traffic nearly stopped Jack reached over and fiddled with the programmed buttons on the Land Rover's radio. He flipped through stations the rest of the way to the hospital, not really believing that he would come across the song, but hoping he'd hear something that would trigger his memory.

He pulled into the parking structure and headed to the parking space marked J. Shepard. He parked and unbuckled his seatbelt, but he wasn't willing to face the day yet. He leaned his head back into the seat and exhaled. Then just as he sat up and reached for the keys he heard it.

_I can hear her heartbeat from a thousand miles_

_And the heavens open every time she smiles._

He shook his head in disbelief. "What are the fucking chances?" he said it out loud in his empty car. He sat there still, his hand still touching his keys. He listened to the entire song, didn't even notice the looks he got from the other people who worked at the hospital.

When the song ended, he pulled out the keys and got out of the car. A few minutes later as he was walking down the hospital corridor to his office he thought he may have actually smiled.

At the end of the day, he was sitting in his darkened office, trying to clear his head before heading home in the still pouring rain. He flipped on the dim desk lamp and absently flipped through the mail in his inbox. He had tossed it aside that morning, not wanting to deal with it. There were a few bills, an invitation to a medical seminar that he had no intention of attending, and then he saw it. A small envelope with his address hand written in cramped but neat script. He recognized the penmanship immediately. It was the same as the one from the folded note that he kept tucked away in his nightstand. The return address said Karen Rousseau. How had he missed this?

He examined the envelope for any clues as to where she might be. It was stamped Hartford, Connecticut. He knew she must have moved on from there by now if she had thought it safe enough to send word to him. Still, she was probably still in the Northeast somewhere. It had to be freezing there this time of year. He could not picture her in the snow.

He slid his finger through the gap in the envelope and tore it open. There was nothing of any real substance in the letter, just standard -How are you-I'm fine-Wish you were here- filler. But that didn't make it any less important to him. It was just her letting him know that she was okay. And he finally felt able to breath normally for the first time in 6 months.

He had known she wouldn't be able to give him any specific details and he was grateful just for the knowledge that she was well enough to make contact. As he reached the end of the letter though, he felt a hope growing in his chest that he tried to quell. She had written one single line that he read again and again.

_See you soon, Love K _

He blinked back hot tears that coated his eyes. His emotions had always run so close to the surface that it didn't surprise him. His parents had hated it, their oversensitive male child in the austere, hard world they had created for themselves. He had merely grown used to it. And the idea that he had received the letter on the very same day that he had heard her song, it was more than bizarre. It was almost too much.

-------------

A few days later, after a long shift at the hospital that had included a 6 hour surgery, he had stumbled up the stairs and crashed on his unmade bed. Within minutes he was dreaming.

He heard a knock at the balcony door. He pulled the shades aside and saw her standing behind the glass. He knew it was a dream because it was dark out and his shift had ended at 9am. He had only just fallen asleep, there was no way it could be dark yet. Jack was logical that way. The fact that she had managed to get up the balcony from the outside and there were snow flurries surrounding her did not faze him in the slightest. He noticed that she was wearing a heavy jacket. How smart of her to think ahead for just such an LA storm, he thought to himself. But then he noticed she wasn't wearing shoes at all.

"Kate," he said through the glass. "Where are you're shoes? Don't you know that over 90 of body heat is lost through the head and feet? You'll catch a cold!"

Kate motioned to her ears and shrugged, indicating that she couldn't hear him through the thick glass. Then she pointed to the door. He tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge.

Suddenly Kate held her fingers up to her ear and mouth like a phone. Jack heard the ringing in his head. He searched frantically for a phone, but couldn't find one. He looked at Kate standing out there in the cold, trying to talk to him and got so sad. He sat down on the floor and despondently crossed his legs.

But then he heard her voice, loud and clear despite the glass. "Pick up the phone, Jack."

He opened his eyes and reached for the phone on his nightstand. "Kate?" He didn't know how he knew, he just knew.

There was a beat. It was just long enough for his heart to become lodged in his throat. Then he heard her speak, "Hey Jack."

**The End**


End file.
